My Mistake

dos

i was on my way to the studio because i need to figure out why jaebum hyung is ignoring me. when i got there i saw that jaebum hyung was writing lyrics for our upcoming album. he looked so tired. maybe he saw stressed & i'm just probably going to stress him out more.

"jaebum hyung?"

he sighed and turned around "yes youngjae?"

"are you busy right now? because if you are i can-"

"no, youngjae. it's fine. what's up?"

"um, it's just that lately you've kind of been avoiding me?"

"why do you say that?" jaebum hyung asked while glaring at me.

"e-every time i try talking to you, you run away. or when i want to make plans you always say your busy, but before you would always make time for me."

jaebum hyung stayed quiet for awhile. all he was doing was staring at me, as if he was trying to find a way to justify himself.

"i'm not avoiding you, youngjae."

"but you are!"

"i'm not! i've just been busy! why can't you understand?! the world doesn't revolve around you youngjae!"

i stood there shocked. jaebum hyung has never yelled at me. he's never even been angry with me. i could feel the tears in my eyes, they were threatening to fall as he stared back at me.

"look, youngjae, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to yell at you."

"i-it' s f-fine," i said sobbing already, " i won't b-bother you anymore hyung."

"youngjae-"

i left the studio before he could say anything else. i didn't want to be a burden to him anymore.

jaebum's p.o.v
After youngjae left the studio, i felt like shit. i didn't mean to yell at him. i just got so frustrated with having to hide my feelings from him. i'm so in love with him that it hurts knowing i'll never be with him. after sitting there for about an hour i decided it was time to go back to the dorm and properly apologize and youngjae.

when i got to the dorm it was pretty late, so everyone was sleeping. i walked into my room to see Mark in there cuddling with Jackson. i thought it was best to leave them alone and go sleep with someone else. i went to youngjae's and Mark's shared room, if i was going to aplogize to youngjae this would be the best time.

"youngjae?" i knocked on the door three times before i heard a come in.

"hey. i want to talk about what happened in the studio today." i could see that his eyes were red and puffy and it looked like he was ready to cry again.

"it's okay h-hyung, it was my f-fault for bothering you." he was trying so hard not to cry.

"no, it's not," i grabbed both of his hands and held them in mine, " i was being a jerk to you when you were just asking me a simple question. and i'm sorry if you think i'm avoiding, i'll try hard not to, just please, please don't cry anymore." i begged while kissing his hands and forehead.

"hyung it's fine! i'm fine! i just wanted to spend time with you because i missed you." he sniffled. "i just thought i did something wrong and hurt you."

"youngjae, you could never do anything wrong or hurt me." even if you don't love me back, i'll never blame you for it.

"hyung, could you sleep here with me tonight?"

"sure, i don't think Mark hyung will care if i sleep in his bed."

"no hyung, could you s-sleep in the same bed as me?" he asked while blushing.

"okay. move over then." we layed together in bed while he had his head on my chest and i was hugging him. this is all i wanted. to spend time with him and be able to hold him and love him. but i couldn't because he only sees me as his hyung.

"goodnight hyung."

"goodnight youngjae."
i love you.

a/n:
okay, wow, that took me forever to write because i had no idea where to take the story. but at least i have a new chapter up! i'm still deciding whether or not this will have smut, because i've never written any but we'll see how it goes. anyways, thank you for ready!& if you have any ideas you would like me to add don't hesitate to tell me! :)