The Way Regret Flows

She was the type of person everyone avoided, however, there were always whispers, soft murmurs that reached her ears. The rumours that were not only her strength but also her downfall.

She smiled a ghost of a smile. How foolish

Despite being talked about and stared at with fear, her existence had no meaning. Her existence was merely an illusioned curse. As soon as she was seen, and that small moment passed, she was forgotten.

That is, until she met him.

He immediately noticed her, dark sunglasses hiding her eyes but her full lips and sleek dark hair caught his attention. Her lips curled into a very faint smile, his eyes watching her almost hungrily as she passed him. The sweet scent of perfume rising into his nose, who was she?

He noticed people staring her as well but it seems as if she didn't matter after she passed them, she resembled the wind, only noticed when it hits you with such a force only enough to grab one's attention for a moment.

With such determination, he turned around and followed the mysterious woman. And to his surprise, she looked back at him. A small yet knowing smile placed perfectly on her gentle lips. It was a coax, a dare, a warning.

Nonetheless, he followed her. She blended into the crowd, her dark hair clashing against the throng of people that surrounded her. He still couldn't take his eyes off her, from behind she looked like an outsider...an outlier. Something that didn't belong.

But he also an outsider, someone who didn't belong in the society of the world, society thinks of people like him as lazy, a worthless, unproductive member of society that does not make any contributions but in reality, he's one of those that is the most productive. He was an artist, a profession that everyone still believes is wasted on him, being compared to the likes of Picasso and Da Vinci and not in a positive way, who, were only recognized after their time.

He couldn't help but think that she was the same as him, he chased her and chased her, getting close but never close enough to touch her beauty. Eventually, she disappeared into the streets, somehow blending in with the crowd.

Is that what it's like to fit in? He thought. To be like everyone. And that's exactly how it was, to fit in, is to be exactly the same, no individuality, no uniqueness, you are just another one of them. Another person in the unidentifiable throng of people.

He stopped walking and turned back around, heading in the direction of everyone else. He looked over his shoulder one last time. She faced him now, her lips moving fast, words being whispered to him. Words he could not hear but he knew.

5 pm at the docks

Before he could even blink, she was gone again. The docks were a forbidden place, a place of deserted memories. Ones that he used to treasure, ones that he had come to love but also hate.

He found himself at the docks, way too early. The rotting wood and deserted boats sat in the dark murky waters of the lake. The clear evidence of isolation, loneliness, emptiness. He frowned at the sight, imagined the once crystal waters, boats skimming along the water at speed, the cheer of people, her arm around his waist.

The sound of heels stopped behind him. As he turned around, the first thing that could his attention was her dark hair, then her faint smile, then. Her ocean blue eyes.

"You're early, David." Her cool yet smoky voice sending a shiver through him.

"Who are you?" He asked immediately, she had a certain air around her an unmistaken confidence.

She smiled again, it was a coy, teasing smile, "That's not important."

He stepped towards her, in return she took a step back. There was something so familiar about her that it shook him, his lungs unable to fill with air, his palms sweaty, it sat in his chest, crushing him. He began to feel anger.

"Please...tell me," He pleaded, voice gruff with emotion

She smiled wider now, as if enjoying his pain. She stepped towards him, her hand cold as it touched his cheek. He looked up at her as she faced him, his lips parted, his eyes wide as he finally realized who she was,

Her eyes filled with laughter as she looked at him, his arms around her waist. His eyes looking at her hungrily as she stood before him in her swimsuit. They stood together in the lake, wading ankle deep in the water. Her hair was blonde then, her eyes sparkled with delight.

She began walking deeper into the river, the water starting to cover more and more of her body. He followed her hastily, trying to catch up. But, he couldn't. Panic filled his lungs just as water filled hers. He shouldn't have let her go, he shouldn't have let her swim.

He continued to stare at the woman, her hair was nothing like hers but there was no mistaking her blue eyes. They were dull now, darker, with no life but there was no mistaking it.

Tears filled his eyes, kissing his cheeks as they fell. He reached out again, he wanted to touch her, to feel how alive she was, to know that he hated himself for nothing. To know that it wasn't his fault.

But she stepped out of his grasp with that teasing smile, the smile he had a new found hatred for. He blamed himself for 4 years, he blamed himself for letting her out of his arms, out of his sight. He blamed himself for allowing her life to be swallowed by the dark waters.

His anger rose, but it immediately fizzled away when he really looked at her, through his foggy tears, her smile was sad. A single tear of her own rolling down her cheek.

"You need to let go," She whispered, her voice wrapping itself around his ears like music

"I can't," He said, voice thick with emotion.

"You have to," She said simply as she turned around and walked away from him.

He blinked, the murky, desolate docks returned. The sad ominous feeling around the abandoned boats and... she... she was gone.

He blinked again and again, she was nowhere to be found. All he was left with was his empty chest, his broken heart and the place that made him that way.

"Hey!... hey kid!" A distant voice called, "Wake up!"

Huh? He thought.

"Wake up!" The voice became clearer

He was shaken awake with a jolt, a man with a flashlight hovering over him. The rotting wood underneath them creaked, the sky above them was dark. The water lapping softly against the docks.

And with tears in his eyes, there was only one thing that crossed his mind, She never existed.