Umm... England?

A/N
Theres swearing in this so if you are sensitive to that then leave please and thank you!
If you don't know a chav is, it's like an english redneck except they're everywhere, like oml they're an infestation also our beloved England in this is like a mix between a chav and a road man (evolved chav. Watch a memeulous vid on it mate)

Review this if you want (be as mean as you can! Tell us everything wrong or else we probs won't progress so be brutal please!)

Thank you and enjoy <3
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Today was a world meeting in York, north England. However something was missing instead of the smell of tea and the occasional brawl something was not quite right, Italy was unusually quite and Germany was fidgeting in his seat even America was not babbling about his hero complex!

"Somethings missing~" Italy wined like a petulant child
"Oui. Z'ere is; but what?" France questioned
"Wheres iggy!?" America shouted
"Where is England da? He might want to become one with mother Russia kolkolkol" Russia said creepily
"Rather not mate" a familiar voice echoed as England kicked the door down.
"England du- what the?..." America stared dumbfounded

England waltzed in wearing a black nike puffer jacket, nike jogging bottoms and to top it off nike huaraches, man bag and a cap covering his now cut short and spiked hair.
But it was the similar Entourage that were carbon copy's of one another that made everyone gawk
"VAIT WHO ARE ZEY?!" Germany said hysterically
"What 'ave you done to your hair, MON AMI WHAT HAPPENED?!" France wailed
"Mi mandem* innit!" England smiled "and shut up Frog" England snorted the mandem just mumbled 'innit bruv*'
England took his seat next to America and nodded upwards
"Wagwan*." England greeted then started to chug a Lucozade* the other men just nodded and one lit up a joint
"Oi oi! Want to bum a zoot*?" He asked in a thick Scouse accent offering it to England
"Aye go on then." He said smoking it
"What England?! marijuana is illegal!" America scolded
"Face?" England said; while wafting his hand around his head "bothered?" He sneered inhaling the substance happily
"You could get arrested!" Germany joined in exasperated by this so called gentleman
"No! But yer, but no but yer but SHUT UP! I hant even done nothin' or nothin! Its all Katy simmers fault! Shes a right slag I heard she payed ben smith to finger her by the bins in moribobs* car park" England responded
"Wot a sket*!"a man in the group claimed
"Innit!" England agreed
"Does anyone understand what they are saying?" Canada asked
"Who are you?" The fuzzy bear questioned
"I'm Canada" he sighed
"Who?"
"Never mind"
"England dude, what happened to you" America asked
"Wot yer on about?" The
Englishman replied.
Before America could say anything else, a noise erupted in the room

It sounded strange and unheard of. Not many have heard this sound but it was obviously popular among
England and his friends, the idiosyncratic distortion of the english language is known as rap, British rap also known as complete and utter fucking garbage.
"The tin goes SKRRRAT!!" A man shouted as another one rapped terribly
"Fucking Yeah go on bruv!" England cheered now sitting on the table back facing everyone.
"How rude!" Austria claimed
England's head shot round faster than the speed of light, its beyond comprehension how he hasn't got whip lash
"You fucking wot m8?! Yer starting bra?! Bruh!! I will shank ya! Yer fucking knobhead*!" He said walking over and getting his butter knife out of his bag.
"Nah nah man chill! Mans not hot!" The chav said "not worth 'urting poshers innit?" He soothed
"Yeah man lets ditch! I 'eard sam's got a ket den round corner" England said
They all left leaving a flabbergasted* room.
"What?" They all shouted

Little did they know that will not be the last of chav England
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A/N
Thanks for reading!
Remember if your reviewing be like Gordon Ramsey!

Mandem: a group of friends
Innit: isn't it
Bruv: bro
Wagwan: hello
Lucazade: an energy drink that everyone is obsessed with
Zoot: weed
Morribobs: morrisons (a shop in the uk)
Sket: slut
Knobhead: dickhead
Flabbergasted : gobsmacked

Also if you got the little Britain and The Catherine Tate Show reference you're a legend!

Tell me if i should do more or not cheers for reading <3