The Imperfect Author

Chapter Three: A Girl's Tragic Demise

"Who do you want to be, Nicole?" Asked Dr. Arthur Guldan, her therapist.

Always starting with the impossible questions.

Nicole moved uncomfortably on the leather couch.

"Someone confident. Someone happy."

Dr. Guldan smiled, the skin next to his eyes crinkling. For a man of his profession, he smiled too much.

"Why aren't you those things?"

Nicole studied the grey carpet. "Because the world isn't perfect."

The doctor typed on his computer, his reading glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose.

"What do you define as perfect, Nicole?"

This question stopped her, because perfect was such a complex word.

There was such a thing as too perfect, but there was also imperfection. Her life was imperfect, as was everyone's.

"Nothing is perfect in reality," Nicole reflected.

The doctor laughed lightly at this, folding his hands in his lap. "What do you expect, unicorns and magical fairies? The world isn't a Disney movie, Nicole. It never will be. But I'm asking you, what is your definition of perfect?"

"Perfect is where everyone is the best they can be, so they're all happy," Nicole answered, her voice small.

And then she listened dutifully as Dr. Guldan assigned her to a new type of pill.

--

The stack of unedited manuscripts looked extremely daunting to Nicole as she sat down in her cramped cubicle at 8:00 o'clock on Monday morning, cardboard cup of scalding hot cocoa in hand.

She was excited to work more on her story, but Clara kept peering over the wall to look at her.

It was extremely irritating.

Nicole took out her every day office pen, its black ink bland on the paper.

She wished the office would provide colorful things instead of boring ones.

"The Bad-Boy Ate my Muffin," Nichole read slowly off of the title page, sighing deeply before beginning the read. Can't wait to hear this one.

'Summer was just a normal sixteen year old girl' Nicole began to read, doodling absently in the margin of the first manuscript.

She already knew where this story was going.

'She was new in her town, and it was the first day of high school. She wondered if anyone would become friends with her today as she applied mascara to her long, dark lashes, making her vibrant blue eyes pop.'

Nicole drew the silhouette of a girl, and gave her wings.

Maybe she should add fairies to her book.

She skipped to the second chapter, abandoning her sad attempt at a doodle.

'A boy with dark, messy hair and a devilish, sexy smirk ran into Summer, sending her books tumbling onto the tiled floor. Her eyes began to fill with tears as the entirety of her high school began to laugh at her. She decided immediately that she hated the dashingly attractive boy, and would never go near him.'

Nicole added tiny, ink sparkles to the page, and drew several blossoming flowers. Maybe she would write about an obnoxious princess, named after Clara who was rudely sticking her head over the side of the cubicle again.

Nicole flipped to the middle of the manuscript and continued reading.

' "You're so beautiful," he murmured seductively, pushing a strand of her long, blonde hair behind her ear. "How did I never notice you?" Summer shuddered trying to look away. She had promised to never fall in love with this boy, but he was so irresistible.'

Nicole groaned and flipped to the end of the manuscript.

' "I cant believe she died at such a young age!" He wept into the soft hair of the lifeless Summer. "I'll never love again!"'

"Well, that escalated," muttered Nicole, crumpling the manuscript as best she could and throwing it in the waste.

She looked furtively from side to side, seeing that Clara was safely in her own cubicle, and pulled her story out of the filing cabinet.

Chapter Two she began.

She named Kelly's sister Nicole, writing her as the confident, funny character she had always aspired to be. Witty, entertaining, and adventurous.

In this chapter, she would introduce Evan, and describe him as the boy she used to be in love with, not as the sad, tired boy she came home with every day.

The boy who wouldn't stick with her for much longer, and who could blame him?

She wasn't perfect like the Nicole in her story. The real Nicole was average, she was boring. She was sad.