Under the Willow Root

Chapter 55

I go to sleep nestled against Luca's side and don't wake until dawn. I've been exempted from watch duty both because I need the rest and because I can't shoot a bow. Ismeni doesn't have to take a turn either, simply because no one trusts her. Yet, even though everyone knows that's the reason, she still manages to act smug about not having to take a watch and imply at the same time that I'm just a lazy jerk for sleeping through the night. It's maddening.

Even more annoying is the fact that Luca was apparently serious about not letting me out of his sight. Not when I'm eating or sleeping or walking or bathing, which isn't all that bad, really. Bathing in particular. But when he tries to follow me to the latrine, I lose it and we hiss at each other for the better part of twenty minutes until he agrees to wait some ten yards away with his back turned and I agree to bring Kirit with me.

When I complain to Sadra, she just laughs and cracks jokes for the rest of the evening about the importance of compromise in romantic relationships. I try appealing to Bard, but he thinks Luca's being "admirably cautious." I can't tell whether he's being serious or not, but either way, he's no help at all. I go to bed disgruntled and headachey, but I can't help smiling when Luca positions himself protectively at my head to take first watch. Kirit and Pretty Girl flank him like two little soldiers on duty.

Over the next few days, my feelings about this new arrangement shift from annoyance to amusement to tenderness and back to annoyance more times than I can count. I thought that Luca would relax or at least get bored of it, but he takes his self-appointed role as my bodyguard obnoxiously seriously. I remind myself periodically that he's not being a pain on purpose and that there is real danger. In the back of my head, though, there's a little part of me rolling my eyes.

I really, really try hard to humor him, but he's driving me crazy. When I wake up one morning before everyone else, I seize the opportunity to get a few minutes to myself. I'm not going far, I assure myself. Just to the stream to wash my face and clean my teeth with the little stick-brush Luca made me. I'll be back before anyone's even awake. I'll take Kirit with me, even. Perfectly safe.

I scoop the sleepy fox into my arms and slip away, breathing a sigh of relief. Glorious solitude. Kirit yawns and licks my chin, his tail thwacking against my stomach. I congratulate myself for unintentionally covering my tracks. If Kirit had woken to find me gone, he would have roused Luca. As it is, he can't tell on me without leaving me alone, and he knows he's not supposed to do that. If only I'd thought of it ahead of time, it would have made quite a crafty plan.

When I get to the stream, I put Kirit down and dip my hands into the cool water. It feels wonderful. We must be getting into June, I think, but the Empire--or the City, at least--doesn't have months, as far as I've been able to tell. They use moon phases and holidays to mark time, which isn't as difficult as you might think. There are a lot of holidays.

I smile, remembering my too-brief time with the Temple. The City was always celebrating something, and the Temple was always right at the center of it, no matter what bizarre hero or prophet or historical event was being honored. Most holidays, no one even seemed to really know or care what was being celebrated. I certainly didn't. I just liked to watch Sadra and my friends perform. Sometimes I even got to dance myself.

Before each performance, Mother Wenla would bless the dancers. I murmur the traditional benediction under my breath:

"In beauty there is kindness, excellence, and honesty. May you find beauty in yourself, in others, and in all that you do."

I always liked the sentiment. I sigh, thinking that I could have been happy at the Temple. Even Luca wouldn't have been too big an obstacle. Mother Wenla told me once that I would have been considered an adept and given my own talisman. I would only have needed a few months of instruction in the spiritual and procedural side of things. It would have been a good life.