Tales of the Grim Reaper

The Grim Reaper's Day Off

My DeathPad vibrated. Someone was calling. GOD IS CALLING. I usually don't get calls from God. It must be something special. Then I remembered it was Friday the 13th. The most tiring day of the year. But this year it was different. I answer the call. " Hello. " God says " It's been a while since you had a day off right? ". " Yes Lord " I reply. " Today I am giving you the day off. " God say's. I reply with a " But it is the day when most people die! " " Yes but this year is different. " He replies. When he says that, arguing has no effect anymore.

When I am doing nothing I hang out at cemeteries. I like reading the tombstones. " Pete Ross, Yuki Kurochi, Pearl Crypt. " I read. I was startled at the fact that they are all buried in the same cemetery. After reading most of the tombstones I got bored. Luckily I had music and games installed on my DeathPad. I swipe the screen. Flappy Bones, My Talking Death, Skullify. I tapped Skullify on my phone and took my headphones out of my pocket. Apparently I can hear but I don't have ears so earphones would be useless. I listen to music. What's the worst thing I could say. Things would be better if I stay. So long and goodnight, so long and goodnight. The next song comes up. Woah, oh, oh we're so miserable and stunning. Whoa, oh, oh love songs for the genuinely cunning. Then comes the next song. The black magic on Mulholland Drive, swimming pools under desert skies. Drinking white wine on the blushing light. Just another LA devotee. But I feel bored. I need to do something. I need to take someone.

I saw a young boy sitting on the bench in the park beside the cemetery. Perfect target. As I loomed over him to take his soul my DeathPad rang. It was God.

" I do not want you taking someone without my permission! " God exclaims. " Or you will feel my wrath! ". " I will not do it again" I reply. " Go! " God says. As I step out of the room. What a day.

                                             HAPPY FRIDAY THE 13TH