I had found you
I had left you
I forgave you
I forgot you
You possessed me
You controled me
Said you loved me
Said you need me
Lance had felt his depression coming back and he didn't know what do. He left all of his pills back at the Garrison. He thought he could just power through. Obviously he was wrong. Lance sat on his bed staring at the ceiling. The panic attack happening in his mind was invisible and didn't show. Hia mind threw insults at him his head was spinning and his body felt empty and wrong.
He is speaking speaking for me
I'm a worthless human being
He's still speaking speaking for me
Keep your voice down or he'll hurt me
The lack of locks in the castle allowed Lance bedroom door to open.
" Hey shiro is calling a meeting in two hours want to go practice for a little bit?" Keith said standing in the door frame. Even though Lance felt terrible his lover-boy goofball facade had to stay intact and so a wide grin covered his inner torment as he stood up.
" Sure keith, but I'll totally beat you!" He Followed Keith to the training room. When Lance hit the floor for the fifth time he started to get agitated. Not entirely with Keith but mostly with himself. Just then Shiro walked in.
" Good you two are already practicing, I'll call the others in here and we'll making a full paladin sparring match." Lance decided to take a break to ready himself for more practice with the others. After a few minutes all of the paladins were in the training room and we're ready to practice.
" Begin training sequence!l" shiro called out and several drones dropped from the ceiling. One headed straight for lance, coming up fast on his left holding up a staff ready to strike. Lance went to block but the drone kicked his ankle and Lance fell to the ground hard. The drone raised his staff to attack again. Lance rolled away and activated his Bayard. he shot at the drone missing twice and hitting it's shoulder on the third shot. The drone stumbled giving Lance the opportunity to stand again. However The drone quickly caught it's balance and moved to attack again. Lance had a clear shot and was about to take it when another drone hit him from behind. The surprise caused Lance to pull the trigger on his Bayard and because he was falling he missed the drone entirely. Instead it flew past the drone and just barely missed hitting pidge.
" END TRAINING SE-" Lance tried to call out but the two drones both hit him in the stomach and chest with their staffs.
" End training sequence." Shiros voice was calm but terrifying.
Keith and hunk rushed over to pidge making sure she was ok. The two drones over Lance collapsed into the floor.
" What the hell Lance you could have seriously injured pidge!" Shiro yelled, Lance flinched at the older man's tone as he sat up.
" The drone-" Lance tried to explain what happened but was cut off.
"The drone should not have been able to blind side you Lance. You're inexperienced and don't pay attention to your surroundings! And as a result you almost terribly injured one of your team mates one of your friends." Shiros face was contorted into a deadly glare.
" Lance you must practice more you don't look like you're even trying! If this happens again I will be forced to ban you from missions until you have practiced and are no longer a threat to your fellow team mates!" Lance was hurt a lump was riding in his throat as he battled the tears threatening to overflow. He stood and faced pidge and the others.
" I-im sorry I didn't-" Lance choked back a sob and ran out of the training room. He collapsed just as his bedroom door closed behind him.
Exorcists any save now
I swear to you that I'm fine
Please let me die to be found
He speaks for me nerves that I grind
Lance broke down sobbing. He shouldn't be the one crying he had no right to! He shouldn't be hear! He doesn't deserve to be a paladin he almost hurt pidge! Lance's thoughts grew darker. I can't fix this, I'm useless! I should just die!! He paused realizing what he had just thought to himself.
