Oneshots ↬ Reddie x Stenbrough

What if I Didn't Know You [Stenbrough]

Bill's POV
A blur of pumpkin-colored leaves fell slowly, one by one, but I kept watching. I watched as young children skipped around each other, I watched as fights broke out among them, I just watched. I already knew this year was not gonna be the same, but I didn't understand just how much everything would change. Why did we have to give up?

Because Stan stopped talking to us, all of the Losers drifted apart. And all along, none of us realized he was the one holding us together. Small tears began to form in my eyes, but I wiped them away with my sleeve and sniffled. He was supposed to be there for me, I thought angrily. He was supposed to keep me from letting go of the cliff I had been hanging from for so long.

I looked down at my plate and frowned, once again not surprised that I had no appetite. Grabbing the corners of the tray, I walked slowly over to the trash can and dumped it all in, sighing. Hearing a loud laugh, I looked up and saw Richie joking with Henry Bowers. What a jerk. Of course he had to fall right into Henry's grasp. But he acted like he belonged there. The way his personality was, he could fit in with any crowd. I rolled my eyes and looked over to Beverly, smoking outside on an old wooden bench. My heart sank and I glanced at Eddie, sitting in the corner and breathing heavily. They seemed different, and I realized that this was how they were before they met each other.

More tears started to form and thoughts ran frantically through my head. Choking back a sob, I sprinted to the bathroom and ran into a stall. Not being able to take it anymore, I slammed my fists against the wall and squeezed my eyes shut. I heard a noice next to me, but remained still, taking shaky breaths. The noise was a door opening. I felt a warm breath next to me but didn't bother to raise my head, because I knew who it was. Dropping my arms to my sides, I turned away from him.

"W-What d-do you w-want, Stanley?" I huffed. Stanley lifted an arm and placed it on my shoulder but I shrugged it off, holding my breath to stop from melting at his touch. "Bill, I'm sorry-" He started. "N-No, Stan! Y-You don't g-get to j-just say s-s-sorry and expect a-all to be f-forgiven! Because y-you hurt me, a-and you d-didn't give a sh-shit!" I stomped, still facing the wall.

I unwillingly let him turn me around and caught a glimpse of his face. He was crying, and I wanted so bad to hug him, but I was too hurt. He sighed and croaked, "I don't expect you to forgive me, I'm just asking you to consider it. I know I hurt you, and I've beaten myself up countless times because of it. And I know this probably won't change a thing, but you need to listen to me. I will never do that again, and I don't know what I was thinking. I tried to live in a world without you, without the Losers, but I couldn't."

I sank to the floor and started to cry, more desperately than I had hoped, but I was broken. Who knew he could hurt me this much. Stanley knelt down and wrapped his arms around me, and this time I let him. It was gonna take awhile to forgive him for all the painful moments I had because of what he did, and he knew that. But I knew he would stay this time, and we could start fresh.

yea stan that was stupid.
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