Hey, Chris. I heard about what happened with your boyfriend, and I wanted to offer my deepest condolences. I don't know if you remember me or want to even talk to me, if that brings back trigger memories or something like that. But I still wanted to be a good person and message you my best wishes. I wish I could see you in person, but I understand that you're busy with... everything. Just know that I'm always here if you need someone to talk to, ok?
Oh, this is Jonny by the way.
I smiled at the incoming messages on my mobile. I hadn't heard from Jonny since the night of the accident, though I had thought about him every day, wondering if he would ever message me, like he promised. Despite the circumstances, I was glad that he kept his promise.
I quickly slipped it out of my pocket and into my hands, preparing my thumbs.
hey jonny. im actually rlly glad u messaged. wanna come over? im feeling rlly lonely atm :((
I sighed. None of it was untrue. Since Guy had died, I had felt even more lonely than usual. He had been my soul mate, my love, my everything, and I killed him in my stupidity.
That was another thing; I had never known that a man could feel so much animosity towards himself. I felt guilty every moment of the day. Why was I awake and Guy not? Why was I the one able to make myself breakfast? Why was I the one sitting in front of the telly? Why was I the one doing all these things without my partner beside me? Why couldn't it have been Guy standing in my place?
I sighed, and hadn't noticed that I was crying. I looked up to the heavens, hoping that's where Guy was now. I don't know what I was expecting. Guy staring down at me? His face turned into a smile as he waved at me? I don't know, but I was disappointed when all I saw were fluffy, grey clouds rolling in, to cover the clear blue that had been above me before.
I sighed and looked down, somewhat pleased to see that I had a new message from Jonny.
Of course! Anything to help you out. Just send me your address.
I sent him the address and scrambled inside at the sound of thunder. "Fucking climate change," I mumbled, suddenly angry at nothing in particular.
I kicked a recliner, turning it upside-down. I had actually been living with Guy until the accident- the place I was living in now was actually my brother's flat, but he was on holiday for a few weeks with his wife. My knees gave out and hit the hardwood floor with a crack, though I was in too much pain emotionally to take care of it.
A knock at the door forced me to stumble to my feet, and I prayed for the neighbour's sake that it was Jonny and not some sort of prank (which Al had warned me about). I opened the door and was very pleased to see Jonny standing there.
He gasped when he saw me, and he probably had a right to. I hadn't taken a shower or shaved in days, all of my clothes were taken from Al's drawers (and, unfortunately for me, he was shorter than me), and I had probably lost weight from not eating. "Chris, you look awful," he said.
I just rolled my eyes. "Thanks, Jonny."
He sighed. "I'm sorry, I'm just worried about you."
I shrugged, and motioned for him to come inside. He looked around at the messy room and the stain on the mahogany-colored tiling left from my fall to the floor. He gasped again, then turned back to me. "What's this blood from?" He asked, and I mechanically pointed at my knee, as if I had done it a million times before.
"Chris! We need to dress your wound!"
I shrugged again. "Why? What's the point?"
He stared at me as if I had just told him that I eat babies for a living. It was strange, seeing this man so serious and caring when at the pub, he had been happy and carefree. Although, he was probably drunk, and that was before the murder of my boyfriend. "So that you don't bleed out! You're losing blood relatively quickly," he exaggerated.
YOU ARE READING
Ghost Story
Fanfiction"Sometimes, the only ones that can help us escape the demons of the past is ourselves." [Berrytin/Buckin au]