All Roads Eventually Lead To You

The Matter with Prince Charming (I Say Boo to Disney)

When I arrived late last night all I had the energy to do was to hug and kiss my mom, give my dad a guy-clench, bring out my agitated cat from his carrier and drag  my bed-raggled garbage bags to my sister's room.

I slept like a log and woke up at 10AM stumbling to our kitchen in my ratty sweats and uncombed hair which now is disgustingly oily and matted after not having a bath for more than 24 hours.

"So bebe, what happened?" my ever beautiful mama asked - who looked unbelievably so put together so early in the morning. Why haven't I inherited her elegance gene?My loyal fans should see me now...I would be the star of their hilariously truthful memes.

She placed all of my favorite dishes in front of me and my mouth watered with hunger while my eyes filled with tears. Despite the fact that my love life has gone down the toilet, it is good to be home!

"Ohhhh bebe... is it that bad?" my mom's worried voice echoed around the room.

At this, my dad who has been busily reading on his tab and barely gave me a grunt of acknowledgement when I came in (he is the strong silent, type in our family of loud divas), raised his head and regarded me intently.

"Do I have to kill someone, bebe?" he asked in an intense tone that non-family members would have taken seriously.

"That would make all your fantasies come true na, Da?" I chuckled as I was temporarily distracted from my misery when I heard him make his offer.

My Da is a complete crime and investigation buff ever since I could remember. He has all the complete CSI seasons, Law and Order —local and foreign crime shows, it does not matter.He is a walking almanac of perfect crimes and conspiracy theories of famous murder or homicides.

My mae just chuckled as she playfully ruffled my dad's hair in passing before taking a seat beside him so that we could start eating our breakfast.

I took a bite of the my favorite ham and cheese omelette, swallowed convulsively and admitted to them that I am now officially Prince Charming-free.

My announcement was met with complete silence...then sighs of relief...then a small yelp from my Da when he opened his mouth to say something and Ma visibly kicked him to keep him quiet and finally my Ma cleared her throat loudly before speaking.

"Was this a mutual decision or did you leave him?"

It was a neutral-enough question if not for the inflection on the "leaving" part. Had they been expecting this?

When I came out to my parents it was rather anti-climactic...I was expecting fire and brimstone but all they did was to embrace me and reassured me that though it is a surprise, they will always love me and do their best to understand what I was brave enough to share with them.

Then my father completely spoiled the moment by quoting statistics on gay-bashing related deaths before handing me his credit card, telling me to order what I need from Amazon to make my "gay lovelife safely amazing". I still cringe whenever I think about that conversation.

Their immediate concern was how would this impact my dream as an actor.I told them that it should not matter if I am gay or straight...but if it does come up I will tell them the truth. I won't be living a life of lies but nor was I giving up on my dreams. Come what may, I have to find a way to do both.

I was fortunate that my debut series was in a BL genre and when I admitted my sexuality in one of those interviews, the fandom went crazy. I was lucky...so deymn lucky that the reception was so warm that it covered up a small section of less than pleased promoters and producers. After the media circus died down, I was still able to get projects...tho admittedly, most of the meaty offers were predominantly boyslove-themed.

I was involved with few of my co-actors who will remain unnamed for privacy purposes (since quite a number of them are now household names and I don't want to rock their proverbial boat *wink wink nudge nudge*). I kissed a lot of frogs...some of them are out and proud...some of them still hiding in their lily-pads before I met Prince Charming, who turned out to be the Gamabunta of my life. If you don't know who that is, I weep for your childhood.

Prince Charming came into my life five years ago and he quite literally swept me off my feet. We met in one of Thailand's famous dating games and I was supposed to be searching for the Date-of-a-Lifetime.First task I set was someone who could carry me away (like literally) into the sunset and my prospective dates' task was to carry me around the studio and I get to choose which one did it best.Hey, it may sound stupid but getting carried by handsome guys - ain't no skin off my back.

Prince Charming is one of the most attractive guys I have ever met and since I work in an industry of beautiful people that is saying something. He was an ex-model who dabbled in acting before starting his own talent agency which became the IT thing in Thailand.He was out, proud, rich, successful and beautifully handsome...who can resist that kind of wonderful?

I couldn't and I didn't. Less than a month since we started dating I moved in with him and I thought I have found my happily ever after.

I introduced him to my parents and they welcomed him politely although I sensed a bit of reservation whenever we spend time with them and I just dismissed it as wariness of having to face actual proof that their only son is indeed, gay.

Now on hindsight, I should have realized that my parents, who are the warmest of people I have ever known, were only kinda civil to him...they have never really taken him into the fold unlike some of my co-actors or staff members - now turned friends that I have brought home and had ended up as adopted sons and daughters of the family.

Even my darling cat, Yo, whom he had gifted to me, could barely tolerate him. They would warily circle each other at home...and would only interact nicely if I was there to mediate. Yo would only let him pet him for a minute or two before bolting away with a hiss and a swipe of his sharp little paws. Prince Charming always sported scratches on his hands and arms whenever I was away on location shoots.I dread to ask what actually happens when I was not there.

I guess I was too in love with the idea of being in love to pay attention to these little clues that well, he is not the Eric to my Ariel - in fact my ending turned out to be the Hans Christian Anderson version rather than Walt Disney's.

Will this put me off my search for true love's kiss?Hell, no!

Even bruised and battered, my heart will forever be ready for another adventure...and what an adventure it will be!✌️

My greatest love affair started with me being dunked in mud and nearly trampled by an elephant.

Quite auspicious, is it not?😱