Dreams (Wonwoo version)

Dream

You know people always says that dreams do come true. At some point, at some time it really am. But not every dream will be coming true. At least not my dreams.

Living in South Korea, my dreams are not rare at all. Everyone wanted to be recognised. They wanted to be the centee of attention. They wanted to change their lives to a better one. With becoming an idol nothing is impossible. But to be an actual idol is one.

I could only sigh whenever I thought about it. No matter how hard i tried I seemed to be failing.

"Stop singing"

"You'll never debut with that voice"

"Honey, please find a better future" even my mum didn't support me. Maybe i am bad at singing.

In Changwon, there's no such thing as being an idol is absolute but so many celebrities were born in this city. I wish i could become one. But now? Everything seems to be crumbling apart. I will never become an idol. I'm 22 this year (korean age) and I'm growing old to debut. All the rookies were mostly 18,19 and 20. I won't stand a chance afterall.

I sighed. Maybe i should change my dreams. It's useless.

"Hyung are you okay?" Bohyuk tapped my shoulder.

I nodded but of course my face would be saying other ways.

"Hey hyung, cheer up!" He hugged me. You know Bohyuk has always be that warm younger brother. I am grateful enough to have him as my brother. He always be there for me.

"Hyung, you watch the teaser for your favourite group yet?" He consulted me.

"Who? Seventeen?"

"Yeah! I have these for you" he passed me some photo which turned out to be those people Photo Cards. It's Seventeen photo cards.

I was shook. I mean i always love their music but how did bohyuk get this PC?

"How in the world..." i looked at him.

He laughed, "i asked my girl friends at school to find them and they did so i give it to you"

It wasn't normal at all i have always knew Bohyuk was popular in school and girls would do anything for him but getting this PC for me is just.... I don't know what to say. I'm speechless.

"Thank you" i cried. I was touched. He always been taking care of me when I'm the one who supposed to gake care of him. I'm the older one here.

"Hey chill out hyung, i love you that's why" he hugged me. I was still crying.

"Care to sing a song for me?" He pleaded.

Honestly he was the only one who wanted to hear me singing. He's the reason why i start to like singing besides reading and playing games. He loves it since he was a young kid. My source of dreams.

I sang him a song from my fav list, Crush-Don't Forget.

——

Seoul, 10:45 AM

What a flashback. I believe that was 2 years ago. Before i moved to Seoul to pursue my dreams altho convincing mum and dad to come here were not very easy for me. Well they never trust me especially when i was never a talkative person myself. Unlike my brother, i would rather be alone and stay quiet.

To be an idol is my dream!

But.....

I sighed. I've been changing companies for the past 2 years. I was lucky to sign contract that can be broken anytime. I trained so hard but they just won't let me debut.

I grew tired. Just how long i have to wait?

If you were wondering how i survive? My parents have a house in Seoul so i stay there. Food and money? I dont really eat and i dont spend that much on anything, my parents gave me money but i iust dont use them too much. I have enough for savings.

I turned on the TV.

it was Music Show, somehow it brought bitterness inside me. I wanted to be like them, the idols. Standing on the stage while singing the songs for their fans, get cheer up on the stage. I wished for that.

Seventeen make their comeback this week. All sparkles and handsomeness overload on the stage i mean 12 guys with beautiful faces how could people resist this?

I sighed again.

I walked outside just to get myself strong. I like it that way. I am emo at the time but i do walk around sometimes.

Besides, it's morning. Well not so morning but the fall breeze still there. I bud in my earpod to listen for some music while i was walking around the Hangang river.

Some people are dating, relaxing, walking and jogging. It was a peaceful day. But somehow i was sad. My dreams are yet to be true. It has been 2 years I wasted here in seoul. I should gave up. I should be back to my hometown. And be a local businessman and live my life normally.

2 years were wasted will i managed to get hold of myself? I'm reading to let go of my dreams. For now.

Suddenly my playlist played, Lee Hi - Breathe. How coincidence the song matched my feelings.

Normally i would only humming along to the song because I'm outside. But I don't know why i felt like wanting to sing this. I don't care anymore about people. It's not like i will debut tomorrow if i did. I mean here so many people sing on the road so it's going to be fine.

As soon as the song started to play. I was emotionally ready. This is a sad ballad about people to hang on their lives. It suited my situation right now.

I started to sing afew lines along with the music. I couldn't hear my voice, i volume up the sound. As i walked around while singing, people had their eyes on me. Was i that bad? Sorry but I don't care anymore.

Some of the are recording me. Great now I'll be the greatest joke ever on internet. I closed my eyes. Ignore them as i get into deep of my emotion. The chorus.

I sang it melancholy. I sang it with all my heart, my very last piece of dream that I'm willing to let go.

Someone's breath. That heavy breath
How can I see through that?
Though I can't understand your breath
It's alright I'll hold you

(Please refer to the song to understad the feelings)

Before i realised i was crying. Tears were flowing down. I covered up my face and ran. It was too embarrassing for me. It's over now. I'll end my dreams here. Jeon Wonwoo will never debut as an idol. I will never be.

It's time to forget this stupid dream and go home.

——

New series of Wonwoo ❤

How do you like it?