The Day I Stopped Being Christian

Prologue: Summer of 2016

"Doesn't this make sense?" my father asked, his arms outstretched as he explained his point. He always talked with his hands, drawing diagrams in the air and on paper; always detailed.

"It does," I nodded, taking it all in.

Dad scratched the back of his head of chocolate brown hair, removing his glasses a moment to rub at his sea green eyes, before replacing them and continuing on.

"Why didn't the pastors of the churches we've gone to talk about this? Why didn't they teach us?"

I shook my head and shrugged, pushing my long blonde hair out from my eyes. "I don't know. Maybe they didn't know themselves."

"These Scriptures... these Words..." Dad lifted his Bible, "They've been staring us in the face all these years! Why haven't we seen them before?" He looked me dead in the eyes. "You see this too, right? I'm not crazy, right?"

I nodded. "I see it too, Dad. Everything you said made perfect sense."

"I think we're gonna do this, Clari."

"I think we should."

He came to me and hugged me, gently kissing the top of my head before releasing me.

"It's time to go to bed."

"Nigh nigh, Daddy."

"Night, Clari."

I walked away, leaving my father sitting in front of the island that separated the kitchen from the living room, walking through the hall, past the bathroom and the memories hanging on the walls, saluting me like a general, congratulating me on making it past those moments in life. I walked past a cabinet and shelf, containing medicine, beauty products that were never used, various blankets and sheets that were changed and replaced depending on the season, staring more pictures in the face before opening the door to my room, closing it quietly behind me as it was late, and pulled my shirt over my head.

My father had decided to read the Bible for himself after years of being in the church. He had made himself right with God and cracked open the Good Book and began to find things that didn't like up with what he had been taught.

He grew up in a Mainstream-Protestent-New-Testament-Bible-Believing-Christian home. His parents diligently read the Word for most of their lives and my father and his sister had grown up believing whatever the church had taught him.

He had always been the black sheep of the family, especially during his teenage years, getting tattoos and piercings despite his parents' objections. Also against his wishes, he had gotten my mom pregnant at 17, marrying her at 18 with myself born soon after.

Dad joined the Air Force and we moved to South Carolina, Germany, New Mexico, and finally back to California. My brother was born in Germany, my mom left us in Germany, my sister returned to Germany with her mother... without us.

When Dad was finally freed from the military, we moved into his parents' home and we went to school. My brother, Caleb, went into kindergarten as one of the youngest kids and the best reader since I had taught him. I went into third grade and watched my life unfold like an envelope containing a letter you wished you had never received.

And now... after all of the moving we had finally, once again, settled back in the same town for the third time in my life, living in my aunt's old house she had rented before buying a house across town with her husband and two children.

And Dad rededicated himself to the Lord.

After everything we had been through, he decided his ways were no longer the best ways, and turned to Him for His ways.

That's when he started reading his Bible.

That's when he turned our lives upside down.

At this time, changed in my pajamas, lying in my bed, I had no idea what this meant. I did not know what these findings would lead to. Over a year later, having a better handle on these findings and the more that had come, I had clung to them with my life, even though I still struggled with my heart and my mind and my desires.

I hadn't realized that the day I accepted this information was the day I stopped being Christian.

Hey guys! I'm back on Wattpad!

So this book is going to be somewhat of a testimony. Since I can't remember everything exactly perfect some of the stuff will be elaborated on (just a disclaimer). Also, I will be going back and forth between past and present, and I will be changing names of people for privacy purposes. Despite these name changes, the story will still be true.

I will update whenever possible. All of my other stories are officially put on hold, and some of them may be deleted simply because I cannot handle them anymore.

Because this story is about me and my life, there will be some things in here that are not... comfortable. You'll know what I mean when we come across them. You may skip those parts if you wish. I won't be offended in any way. I understand.

Please be patient with me. I cannot promise consistent updating. I do have 3 AP classes as well as several other activities  (which will be mentioned in this book) and I do live in 2 separate environments.

I do know the name of the book is... shocking. Do not fear. I still believe that Jesus is Savior who came to die for the sins of the world. I still believe in the one true God. I will explain what the title means as the book progresses.

A lot of things in this story will be controversial, so while I am open for discussion of these things, please do not cause arguments among one another. Please understand we are all united in Jesus Christ, and I only wish to share my story, and maybe impact yours little bit.

Thank you for reading! See you next update!

~Clari the Clarinet