Love. Love is what people call the answer, true happiness but all it brings you is to your knees in heart ache and pain. It makes you feel like your on top of the world and if your on, as people say, 'cloud nine', but it also brings tears to your eyes and makes you feel as if you are broken.
I don't love. I don't need to love. Because I know that all it brings is the nightmares. All it brings is the pain.
"MUMMY!" I cry out.
The blood, the screming, the bang, filled my senses. Tears streaming from my eyes, covered my vision. My world didn't go black. I sit in that corner and watch as my mothers frail body falls to the groud and watch the light and life drain from her eyes and her body go stiff. And with her final breath she released three words...
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"I love you."
Those words, those horrible words fell from his lips. I couldn't speak. I wouldn't speak.
"Well say something." He said, urgancy and worry ringing out through his voice.
This would have been the most perfect moment, lying on his bed, side by side staring into eachother eyes, arms wrapped around eachother listening to sweet music in the back ground. But it wasn't right. It was all wrong because I cant love, I don't want to love.
"Oliver you know that I cant...love." Pulling myself out of his grasp and begining to stand up from the bed. His hand comes out and grips my upper arm pulling me back down to the bed.
"You can, just look at me. Tell me you can love." His hand comes out to my chin and lifts my head so our eyes could meet.
I had been with Oliver for 6 months. He had brown short hair that he keeps up with gel, stands at 6 feet which was taller than my 5'8 body. With deep drown eyes. He wasn't as you say popular but he was more than me. His friends didn't like me, so I didn't like them. Just stay away from them, is what I have to keep reminding myself.
He knew I didn't love, that I couldn't but yet he goes right a head and says that.
"I don't love you." I finally reply.
With that I ripped myself from his arms and walked swiftly out the door, into the hallway leading to the front door and out the door onto the pathway. I could hear him calling my name and the foot steps coming from behind me but I got to my truck slamming the door and putting Breaking Benjamin on full volume. Turning out of the parking spot I looked in my rear veiw mirror to see Oliver standing by his front door watching as my truck drives away.
I let out a sigh finally letting in what just happened. He just had to ruin it by saying those 3 stupid words. I mean, we could have stayed together for ages and I would have been happy, I guess, but when you bring love into it, I just can't do it, I can't love.
Parking my car outside my house I took out my key and quickly shut the door racing up the drive way. Our house wasnt big at all. It was tiny but thats all we could afford for at the moment. Knocking twice, I stood there as thoughts were racing through my head. A couple of seconds later the door opened to reveal my little sister in her new shorts and very revealing top. She thinks she so 'swag' its rediculous. I mean, showing of your stomach and ass and taking way to many 'selfies' just seems stupid.
"Oh, you're home early." She says as her smile fades.
She's going through some sort of stage. When she becomes a teenager she is going to be horrid. She walks off with her phone in hand probably talking to one of her new friends at school. She's blonde and tall and skinny and so of course shes popular. Total opposites. I got my dads genes and she got mums.
