Darkness

A look into the past

I ran up to Billy as fast as my little five year old legs would carry me, long red locks bouncing off my back behind me. He gave me a soft smile and kneeled down to pick me up his deep voice rumbled across the quiet room, "Hello Izzy". I threw my arms around him as he lifted me up and gave him my biggest grin ever, "Hi Billy....you guys have to go again?" Billy gave a short nod to confirm what my father had told me. I let my sharp emerald eyes fall upon the other men who also gave a nod before landing up my father. He walked over to Billy and held his arms out to me, Billy let go of me as my father gathered me in his arms. I clung to him for dear life and inhaled deeply taking in the scent of his cigar mixed with sweat and old spice body wash. Tears started to form in my eyes as I looked up at my father not wanting him to go, for once in my short life I didn't wanted him or the other guys on his team to go. "Please daddy don't go, I have a bad feeling about this. Can't they send someone else? Why not send the second best team the USA has?" My father dropped his gaze down to my face and brushed his thumb against my cheek to stop the tear that had fallen. "Nothing bad is going to happen pumpkin I promise. We will be back before you know it." His lips brushed my forehead as he sat me down and looked around at the men before me. He gave a brief nod to them before they started to file out of the house. Most of them just ruffled my hair as they walked past and chuckled when I gave them a death glare. Billy however knelt down before me and took my hands in his and whispered softly, "I have a bad feeling too darlin' but don't worry your daddy will come back to you." With that he stood and walked through the door. Finally it was my father's turn to leave and he knelt down beside me pulling me into an almost bone crushing hug making me giggle slightly. He pulled back slightly only to rest his lips upon my forehead once more, but instead of pulling away he sat there for a few seconds inhaling softly with his eyes closed. I stood there with my tiny hands resting upon his much larger ones as tears threaten to spill over again. "I will be back soon baby girl, be good for grandma." Then he stood and walked to the door leaving me standing there with his mother, my grandmother, the door closed softly behind him but to me it felt like death had closed the door on their lives. I ran to the window and ripped back the curtain watching the dark vehicles until I could see them no more. Then I turned my gaze upon my grandmother who gave me a soft smile and open arms. I ran to her and she pulled me onto her lap, "You are a special little girl Elizabeth so tell granny what you saw."

I closed my eyes and thought back to the dreams that I kept having over and over again since daddy had told me that they were being called away. I took a deep breath to steady myself as I began to re-live the nightmare that plagued my sleep. "The jungle was alive somehow grandma. It has been stealing people's lives for a very long time. I don't know how long grandma but I know it has been a long time. It goes after daddy and his men. They die grandma, I don't know who dies but I know they die. I could hear screaming and they are all really scared." I choked on my own words as tears streamed freely down my cheeks splashing onto my hands. I looked up at my grandma with my eyes shining from the tears that spill from them. I could see the lines crease more so on her face as she frowns slightly. She seemed far off and distant, as if in some deep thought or trance. Finally her steel grey eyes looked down at me and her wrinkly warm hand brushes away the tears. "Let us hope it does not come to that child." Then she set me down and began to make preparations for dinner, I stood at the window and gazed up at the sky with a feel of dread clutching my stomach. I didn't sleep good the whole time my daddy was gone. I would toss and turn and wake up silently screaming as terror ripped through my rapidly beating heart. Then one night the nightmares suddenly stopped as I slept quietly the whole night and perhaps that should have been my first clue that something wasn't right.

He came home with a haunting look in his eyesand with far more cuts and bruising than I had ever seen on him before. I ranto him and he grabbed me, clutching me for dear life, like he feared this was adream and that I wasn't real. I looked over his shoulder, none of the guysfollowed him inside like they normally did whenever they returned home from amission. I felt my stomach drop and I only managed to whisper, "It came true...."Then I felt my father squeeze me just a little tighter as my shoulder becamewet. It was then that I realized my daddy was crying. I had my arms wrappedaround his neck so I squeezed my arms as hard as I could to let him know I wasthere for him. After that day my daddy was never the same.