Don't forget to smile; Myg + Pjm

Miserable

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Miserable

•mɪz(ə)rəb(ə)l•
adjective

(of a person) wretchedly unhappy or uncomfortable.

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Yoongi's pov.

Currently the word miserable would describe me perfectly.I hate this place, the walls, the crazy people, the nurses that couldn't give a shit about the patients, the ignorant opinions no one asked for, the food and even the smell of this place makes me sick.I looked at the white plastic wristband on my wrist.I wanted to just rip it off and throw it away, but I've already done that 8 times this week and it's no use.I hate having it on, I feel like I'm a product in the grocery store with a label telling the potential customer what's wrong with me.

I laid on my bed and heard the alarm ring.The door opened and I just looked at it, I didn't want to step out.It would be a boring day, just like every other.I, however, had to and walked out into the same line with crazy people.We walked like zombies in a line, wearing the same white t-shirts and pants.The same white socks and the same fucking wristbands.We all walked in line to get the disgusting slop that the corporation called food.

I looked at my plate, I didn't want it.I just stood up and walked out.As I was walking out a female nurse I had gotten to know far too well stopped me and looked at me with "the look" I looked at her, giving zero fucks.She then sighed and said "I know you don't want to, but you have to take your pill just like everyone else" I looked at the bright red pill she had handed out for me.I rolled my eyes and said, "All that will do is turn my brain into mush and make me a zombie just like everyone else in here!" She sighed even louder and said "Still, the same answer as always" I took the pill and pretended to swallow it before saying "Still, we both know I'm right"

I walked into my room and spat the pill into my hand before throwing it into the garbage bin.Disgusting, those pills fuck with your head.They make you dull, emotionless and obedient.They also somehow make you even more depressed.Even tho they are supposed to be doing the opposite.But in this world, no one will help normal people.And especially poor people, they are fucked.I haven't been to their district because I'm not allowed to but I can only imagine the chaos in there.Yet no one raises a finger to help them.

I went back to lay on my bed.This is what I'd be doing for the next 4 hours at least.I closed my eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep.

"HYUNG PLEASE DON'T DO THIS!" I looked behind me to see my best friend Jungkook.He is the only person I feel even a bit bad about leaving.I tried to turn my head back to the edge of the building, but I couldn't.His distressed, sad, tired eyes were begging me to stay still.We had been best friends for so long, but I just couldn't anymore.Even tho I cared about him, I just couldn't...Not even for him.He slowly walked closer and said "Yoongiah...Please don't.Don't leave me yet" I looked at him and said "I have to...I can't do it anymore" Jungkook offered his hand and said "We can do it.I promise, just don't do this!" I looked down at the almost 50-foot drop in front of me.The wind blew softly, I felt like I was getting lighter, inch by inch.I then turned around and saw Jungkook's somewhat relieved expression as he thought I was coming down.I smiled and said "Jungkook, you'll get through it, I know you will.You were the greatest best friend ever" I then let my body fall down.I felt the wind blow at my back and I felt relieved.I was almost waiting for it.I opened my eyes once more and saw the sunrise, it was beautiful.Then everything went black.

I sat up.I was all of a sudden fully awake.I was sitting on my bed, still in this nightmare.I felt a small breeze of relief before it disappeared.I closed my eyes and saw the sunrise in my head.I replayed that moment over and over again.If I didn't suck at killing myself, relief would be all I would feel.

The day went on, boring and the same as yesterday and the day before that and the day before that.I heard that someone actually killed themselves here.Something interesting happened I guess.All it actually did was light a fire under their asses and now they'd be following us all everywhere and constantly staring at us.

I'm very anxious about how do people feel about this, so please if you have the time, give your thoughts on it 😭

-S