She could see her heart ripped from her chest, still beating,throbing. She tries her hardest to keep up and get her other personallity to listen and obey. The control is weakening and soon she will break, looking into the mirror at her pale face then she looks at her skull. It bleeding from her trying to knock herself out. She stares hours on end not knowing what to do anymore. She opens the cabnit and takes out every pill bottle there is. Emptying them on the counter she stares down at them counting...She swallows every single one of them and walks out of the bathroom. His face apears in her brain like lightning flashing bright. Knowing she should have been a better person, someone who could have kept such a perfect,beautiful relationship together. She failed like every other time in her life, she failed once again. She can't go back in time, and she surely can not change what she has done or what she thinks about every single day of her life. She keeps trying to tell herself " Soon you will be perfect...So this...So that...Soon you will be set free...Soon You Will Be Beautiful..." these words run through her head every time she thinks of her past. Tears run down her heated cheeks as she writes this. She can not understand life. She will never understand it and the shit it makes her go through...
