So I'm on my way, about to get to the hell whole called school, Can't wait(!) (hence the sarcasm there).
Here's me mildly panicking cause of how I don't want to go. Negotiating wether to stay here or go home.
I do eventually decide to go in but I immediately regret everything: regret how I did my hair, how I have my uniform, what bag I had, etc.
I decide to run to the lockers and go and hide in my locker. I pretend to text someone but I'm actually just playing a game. I'm still listening to Sam Smith, but I'm still not distracted but the fact I have to go through this day.
Everything is going round in my mind, and I can't stop thinking about life and things that could happen today or tomorrow or the day after. I just can't stop thinking that you're there waiting for me to go to class, or the fact that you'll get infuriated if I don't get there in time. I start really panicking, I can't breathe, I can't see. Everything's gone dark and I see little spots of colour... when all of a sudden, I start crying. But I start really crying that I feel like I can't stop.
After 10 minutes of crying, I stop. I put everything away and I get myself together. I get out of the locker room and go to my form. I'm 'smiling', everyone waves and I wave back.
My form tutor comes in, she sees me and says hey, like she always does, I awkwardly wave back. She's sees somethings wrong, she asks what's up, I respond all so immediately, I'm fine. She notices how I don't want to talk and she respects me decision.
And the day goes on....
