the ramblings of a softhearted introvert

10:34pm

Yet again I feel the crushing weight of sorrow upon my chest,
Of past loves, past losses, past feelings,
That are all still very much present.
I long for love, I long to be held and cherished as I would love, hold and cherish,
I see couples, I see people who are not together but are in love, I see so many people,
Some of which who came together so effortlessly,
Giving and receiving the love I wish I had in my life.
I try not to be bitter, I try to be happy for these people.
Many of the people in relationships are not with who they should be,
They take the other person for granted, abuse and neglect them, they cheat and they use or they long for another but "settle" for someone who isn't meant to be theirs,
They were meant to be loved, held and cherished by another.
Words are left unspoken, love left seemingly unrequited.
Speak your heart, instead of closing it up.
Let the hurt overwhelm you, feel it with all of you, but don't be afraid to get up and love again.
I love, I love with my whole heart, my whole soul, my whole being, every part of myself.
I've been fucked over more times than anyone ever should be,
It's so unfair, life is so fucking unfair.
I live for passionate kisses, longing glances, tired morning cuddles, everlasting love, heartbeats in sync.
I crave the good and the bad, with that one person.
One person.
Who I have not yet met, I try to fill that void, but no one meets my standards, no one gives me the love that I give to them.
They long for another, they leave me, they take me for granted.
Because they aren't them?
One day, I will be with someone who loves me, cares for me, supports me, doesn't let me feel unloved for even one second.
And I live for that day.
Until then, I wonder aimlessly, blind heartedly, trying to find that person.
Feeling the emptiness.
Feeling the hurt from all the relationships failed, all the unrequited love, weighing down on me.
A deep sorrow within my chest.
I long for them, I will not rest until I find them.
I miss someone I have not yet met.
I long for the day that I can hold them in my arms and call them mine.