A Forest of Secrets

Chapter 38

Alaric held Jo, without taking his eyes off Laurentius. Those yellow reptile-looking eyes she saw before getting into the gem, the eyes that kept her up at night. It was him. It had been him. But-- no. What did that mean? She gave Alaric an inquisitive look, Laurentius looked down at his feet, looking like a kicked dog.

"You're a crisalidae," Alaric's voice was monotone, wary. He held Jo's arm protectively, perhaps a reflex reaction. "That's why you don't dare to use blood magic," he accused.

"Yes," was the mages' short answer. For once, he didn't say more. Jo's voice was hidden in a corner of her throat, her tongue was paralyzed. All this time Laurentius had lied to them? They had traveled with him, shared a camp, shared secrets, laughter, private moments. And he had kept that dangerous information from them. He was a dark mage, a crisalidae. He could turn into an imago at any given minute. He suddenly became something dangerous, unstable, before her eyes. Alaric looked at the mage with scorn.

"And Gerard didn't realize? How? How did you manage to conceal it?" Alaric spat.

"I used a glamoring spell, I keep it active at all times. Back at the Core Silvam I dropped it without meaning to, my magic was focused entirely on saving you, Jo," he looked at her, his eyes were black again. Human. "I was expecting you to say something--  I figured you didn't notice when you didn't."

"I noticed them," Jo whispered, "I didn't know. I didn't for one second think they might have been yours," she looked down. She couldn't look at him. She didn't know how to feel about it. Hurt, betrayed? Yes, all that. But she also felt like she was being unfair. Guilty, for judging Laurentius like that. He had helped Alaric and herself then and many times before—crisalidae or not, he was still the same person, wasn't he? A small voice in the deepest corner of her brain didn't want her to listen to reason, the little part of her still wary of magic. She did her best to silence it: Laurentius didn't deserve that. They had to give him a chance to explain himself.

"Gerard knew," Laurentius muttered. He looked ashamed, his usually high and proud chin now almost touched his chest. "He saw right through me as soon as we met. We talked about it, while we scouted. He listened to me, he—he understood. He knew the truth and understood," Laurentius paused for a moment. Jo noticed Alaric was trying to hold back his tears—he was still not over his death and now Laurentius was telling him Gerard had broken his trust. She could understand where Alaric's angst was coming from. "He was a good man, Gerard. And I think that got him killed, just like Volstad suggested."

"I can't believe Gerard kept that from me. After all we-- after everything we've been through," Alaric's voice was filled with incredulity.

"Alaric, it wasn't his secret to tell," Jo said, squeezing his arm. "You of all people know what that means, Laurentius here has been keeping yours for a while, hasn't he?. He won't even tell me, and trust me: I've prodded him nonstop." She smirked. "And this is not the time for explanations," Jo sighed. "I understand how you feel, but, look at him: it's Laurentius. He's the same person who just saved your ass from a ridiculously secured dungeon, our friend, who risked his life, who probably forsake his love life for you-- and me too," she whispered. The distant sound of the monsters lurking in the shadows, getting closer, gave her goosebumps.

"Yes..." Alaric exhaled. "I suppose you're right. This isn't the time, or the place," he conceded through his teeth, "but you won't get away from giving us an explanation, Laurentius. As your friends, you owe it to us. I'll come clean with Jo, " his eyes lingered on Jo's, " then you can come clean with us," Laurentius gave him a warm smile, which Alaric awkwardly reciprocated. Jo would've suggested an awkward group hug, just to make things even more comfortable, but, she didn't want to ruin things with a bad joke. Not the time.