Millie walks by my locker and I run after her. I ask her for a ride to the park. I'm too lazy to walkand I just don't have the time.
"What for?....OHH nevermind. Yah I'll give you a ride," her lips curved into a smile, along with a slight chuckle. I flash a her a nervous smile. We get into her classic, red, mustang it sparkles in the bright sun light. A very beautiful car, I wish I owned one of my own.
She cranks up the radio, wind flowing through her hair, I wouldn't be surprised if Finn doesn't have a thing for her. I try to avoid those thoughts. The smell of flowers, drifts with the wind being rushed through the car. Flowers somehow remind me of Finn maybe it's his lips, that certain shade makes me think of pink roses.
We reach the park and Finn is there waiting for me. He stares past me, to where Millie is sitting. I shrug it off, there only friends, right? He glares at the ground then finally glances up at me. He grabs my wrist and I try not to flinch. It hurts, those scars really hurt especially when someone is pressing on them. It's not his fault, he doesn't know about the....yet.
Finn pulls me along to where a blanket lay in the grass. When he gets the urge to look at me I stare into his eyes. Not in a creepy way, but in a loving way. His eyes shimmer in the beaming sun light.
"Hey...are you ok," His voice breaks me inside. My answer to his simple question is very complex, I can't even find words to describe my feelings. I get flash backs to me sitting in the bathroom holding a small silver blade in between fingers. I stand by the sink, my hand holding on to the blade trembles. I can't go any longer without telling him what I've done, even more flash backs fill my head.
"Finn, I need to tell you something," my voice is shaky and scared. I can't take it anymore, I burst out into tears. He scoots closer to me and wraps his arms around my waist. He cuddles me close. I think to myself I don't deserve this!
"Jack, Im here now.... I'm sorry I'm always away," His voice deep and soothing. Damn right he's always away I can't take it anymore. He takes his hands and wipes away my tears with his thumbs.
"Finn...I can't hold this back...pull up my... sleeves," I told him, my cries much louder now. He takes my left arm, which is much worse, and lifts up the sleeve. He stops to stare at the deep scars that fill my arm. They extend from my forearm all the way to my wrists. I'm not able to wear short sleeves anymore, Sofia or Millie would make me go to a counselor.
I look up and tears are building up in his eyes. . I can't help but stare into his eyes, I wipe the tears off his soft cheeks. We both get up and I reach my hands over his shoulders to hug him, I allow him to pull me closer to his chest. Lasting a couple minutes before I pull away and take his hand, I intertwine our fingers and whisper "Follow me."
I take him into to the woods, away from all human interaction. His hands trace down to the bottom seams of my shirt, he pulls it up so that my top half, is now exposed to the cool air. I smile and then run away from him, I play hard to get. He tries to catch me but I slip away at the last second. I let him catch me this time, he picks me up and starts softly kissing my neck. Finns kisses lead a trail up to my lips. He lets me down, so he can now take his own shirt off. I stand on my tip-toes trying to get up to his height. Our lips connect and I slowly lose control of my actions. I end up against a tree with Finn still attached to me. I'm once again helpless.
We hear russling in near by bushes and try not to freak out, because it might be an animal. I bend down and grab my shirt, then I slip it back on, Finn does the same. I look over to where the rustles start again, I try to be brave and walk over to the bush. I grab a long stick and jab it in the bush, a tiny squirrel scurries away.
"Oh gosh I'm so sorry to disturb ur peace," I giggled wow I just talked to a squirrel. Finn looks over, at me attempting to be brave. He chuckles loudly and bopped his head in response to me being scared of a little squirrel. He has always been the knight in shining armor.
"Jack it's getting kind of late, I think you should go," he told me. I walk with him over to our blanket on the grass. He collects the plain, navy, blue blanket along with his phone. "Wait, I need to tell you something", he spit out, sounding nervous.
"Yes, Finn," I reply curiously and turn around quickly. I'm now concerned, my face feels hot. I look at him, beads of sweat start to form amongst his face.
"I love you and don't ever forget that," the words are music to my ears he blushes. His face is a light pink, that is a sure sign he isn't lying.
"I love you more," I uttered out a smile broke out across my face. I hear a car door slam in response I turn around. It's my step mom Jana, she walks over to us.
" Jack it's time to go. Finn, do you want a ride home," she asked taking turns looking at Finn and I. He nods and starts walking behind me. We walk out to the car and Jana is quiet the whole time. I stare into his eyes, it's so difficult to keep my hands to myself. We arrive at Finns house, I wave goodbye. I mouth the words 'I love you' he never returns my words.
