It's brand new and exciting
I am afraid
Afraid that I'll scare him away
Thoughts I keep telling myself
"Slow down"
"Pull back"
"You're doing to much"
"Be patient"
"Don't make any wrong moves"
I know it's cliche
But I was looking at our astrological compatibility
It said our signs were highly compatible
It also said that the relationship would start off slow.
These results gave me mixed emotions
My mind is at ease
And at the same time
My nerves are on end
I am relieved and on edge
I am consoled and impatient
I am an awkward mess
I know that I should make a move
But I'm nervous
I don't want to be clumsy and artless
I want to take his hand
And stay there
Scratch that
That could be too much
That could be going too far
Calm down
Slow down
You know what.
Screw this holding back crap
I wish I could come up with some witty way to actualise
What I am so wanting to do
I wish I could think up some clever way to ease into what I
Want to do so badly
But
My hands are clammy
And butterflies
No, wasps
Buzz violently in my stomach
I'm trying to come up with something
Something to initiate
Something that will break the ice
I'm trying to come up with something spontaneous
Something cunning
Something canny
Something sly
Something profoundly impressive
Something awe-inspiring
But when I search my mind
Nothing wills itself into my immediate consciousness
I search for something, anything
but my normally witty mind is choking on it's banter
My mind is blank
It's not for good reason
I am flustered at his radiant smile of his.
I am distracted because I am laughing at the jokes he tells me
When he looks at me
I melt like the chocolate brown of his eyes
His sly smile catches me off guard
It just hit me
This is it
This is my bold move.
