7th Grade

November 26, 2017

I lay awake in bed. I am troubled by outside forces. I try my best to survive while these problems are being shoved down my throat.

A usual weekend activity, silent I stay. Almost like I do not exist. All around me, the silence is deafening.

Provoking thoughts in my head. Proving that life has no meaning, no worth. Plain is my afternoon.

Mild sadness taking over. Middle class life unappreciated. Mellow music playing in the background.

Nonsense I speak. No one to tell. Never will I be liberated from my secrecy.

Thorny roses on the grave. This dull day will soon come to an end. The sorrow will pass.

Assignments left to write. Always adding to the pain. Aggravated  I am during this time of the day.

Comforted by nothing. Concentrated on nothing. Caring about nothing.

Or so I thought. Once I awaken, I am bombarded by worries. Only thinking about what is to come when I fail.

Awful it is. Amazingly terrible to only think about others while the anxiety cripples you into a sad, silent, scared rendition of what you used to be. A memory.

Sun descending. Stars arriving. Sorrow continuing.

Dark. Dull. Dead.

Goodnight sweet sorrow. Goodbye until tomorrow. Good until I remember that you follow me in my slumber.

The day might have ended, but the true torture is still to a come. The night is terrifying when it cuddles you, not letting your eyes close. The shadowy grave, where you can't be freed.

Dawn is here. Drifting away. Don't worry a new day is here
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but that's exactly what I'm afraid of.