Your Dark Side.

Why

     Honey~ Honey~ wake up~

     I slowly sat up from my comfortable warm bed, to find my mother at my bedside. "Mm- yes mom," I say rubbing my eyes to get my vision not to be as blurry. "It's your first day of summer camp~!" She sang and happily threw a nice skirt and a plaid shirt at my face.
Why. Why do I dread summer camp so much..
Hm- maybe cause I am forced to wake up a 5:30 am on my SUMMER BREAK! Jeez, wouldn't every other kid would love summer camp- you can hang around with a bunch of your friends and have "so much fun.." ya, no. Not me. Because I have one problem. I don't have any friends. I have a sub-conscious anxiety AND a Social Anxiety disorder.  Ya well, apparently I have to go because if I'm home alone all summer (bc my parents work during the summer) they think I'll hurt myself or some shit. They don't tell me that though. Because they don't want me to know. They think if I'd known- I'd already been dead. The thing about SUB-conscious anxiety is you don't know you're hurting yourself. You go nights and days, that turn into weeks and years complaining you're sick- and that your stomach hurts. You think you can't eat, socialize. At those moments you feel like you are gonna to break down and die. But the truth is- Your doing it to yourself.

==

  Last year, my Anxiety was at its peak. Ever. Fucking. Day. I would go home 1 hour into the school day because I felt 'sick' and I was throwing up. I mean one thing you get out of this is- (don't laugh at me..) you get to throw up on people you hate. Well- I wasn't really trying too, but my schools 'bully' was standing in front of the trash can. And I- I threw up- all over him. (Hehe)

==

   "Hey! Your cereal's getting soggy~!" My mom yells snapping me out of thought. I quickly throw my hair into a high ponytail and jump into my clothes for the day and run downstairs. The TV was blasting the news and my ears began to ring. "Ahhh- wtf mom!" I yell and turn the TV off. "Hey, now I can't hear the news." She yells back while trying to put her make up on. No dip, you can't hear the news- the TVs off idiot! I sit down at the table and poke my now 'soggy' cereal with my fork. Wait. Fork? Idek what's going on anymore. But I wasn't going to eat anyway, there was no point of yelling at my mom again. I rolled my eyes and carried my bowl to the sink and dumped it out. The milk went scurrying down the drain, while the cereal just sat there. I shrug my shoulders and threw on my sneakers. "I'll see you in the car!" I yelled grabbing the car keys and heading down to the driveway. I unlocked the car and sat down in the passenger seat and took out my earbuds.

==

  "Mom, I don't wanna go!" I yell at her when we pull into the summer camp called "Camp Clark." "Yep, you're going! I'm going to be late so let's go!" She says taking out the keys and stepping out of the car. "Nope. You can't make me." I say throwing my chin up towards the sky. She opens the car door and snatches my phone from my hands. "HEY!" I yelled running out of the car and following her down to the campus grounds. Dang- she knows me so well.  I caught up to her and snatched my phone out of her grip. "Hate you so much," I whisper and continue walking alongside her. We reached the 'sign in' table and she signed me in and leaned in the kiss me goodbye. "Ew- no, not here mom!" I whisper-shout and wave my arms around my face so she can't kiss me. "Fine, then. Goodbye Gracie," She says before walking off back to her car. I give her back the face of disgusted as she walks off. Hate that nickname. I'm Grace. Not Gracie.

   I sat down on a bench not that far from where I was abandoned by mother and took out my earbuds and listened to some music. Music is my escape from people. (Social anxiety sucks) One of the camp leaders comes over and yells at me. My music is blasting and I can't hear what she's saying until I take out my left earbud. "Ahem- no phones on campus. You should be playing with other kids." She says holding out her hand. I look at her weird and she just says "phone and earbuds please." I scoffed and shut down my phone and hand it to the lady. "Thank you she says and walks off. Showing me sass as she sways her hips with each step. Slut.

==
I was thinking of just sitting there but she kept giving me a death stare and trying to motion me to get up with her head. So I obey. Walking into the bathroom and looking at myself in the mirror.
  My expression changes to sadness and I rip my hair-tie out and cover my face with my long dark brown hair. Ugly. I slowly walk out of the bathroom cause I can't stand the stench anymore. "Please someone clean that place!" I walked to a different location that had another bench. This time I'm not in the line of sight from that lady, so she can't yell at me. Though I can't help to notice a boy. He has dark skin and curly short black hair. I kept getting stares from him. Hm. Whatever. I look down at my feet and wish that 4:30 pm could come sooner. I wish to be back in my bed, my comfortable bed.

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A/N-
       HEY~~! It's Grace here. This is a new story I'm going to be starting. It's one of my stories that is not BTS related. Sorry.. 😖 (and uh yes- this is a true story. It's a story about me. but don't be alarmed Shae, this happened years ago and i thought this would be a good way of getting it off my chest.)