fight this fatal attraction (cricky)

7

Chris meets up Balz and Ryan, still pissed at them for how the treated Ricky but Chris decides not to hold a grudge. Chris calls them to meet at a local Starbucks, and can't help but smirk into his syrup infused latte when the two men awkwardly walk in, slinking into the seats across from Chris sheepishly. Chris had bought their drinks for them since he pretty much knew their orders off by heart, and they both smiled thankfully.

"Thanks, man," Ryan said, and Chris smiled back at him.

"Hey, about that thing with Ricky the other night, nobody meant to upset him, we were just joking around-"

Chris interrupts Balz with a wave of his hand and a shake of his head.

"Listen, it's all good, I know you didn't mean it," Chris sighs, then plays with the cardboard on his coffee cup for a second, not wanting to make eye contact when he finishes his sentence. "The thing I wanted to talk to about was, you know all the jokes and shit you kept making about me and Ricky? Ricky being gay and having a crush on me? Well, turns out you were right."

Balz and Ryan are awkwardly quiet for a second.

"Shit, is that why he got so upset?" Balz asks and Chris nods.

"Damn, now I feel bad," Ryan says and Chris snorts.

"If you think you feel bad, imagine how I fucking feel," Chris rubs his hands over his make-up free face and groans, Balz and Ryan looking at him with twin expressions of bewilderment.

"What do you mean? Why would you feel bad?" Ryan says, while Balz nods in agreement.

"Yeah, I thought you took him home to help him out."

Chris blushes with both shame and embarrassment at that statement.

"I don't think I helped him. In fact, I think I made things worse," Chris says dejectedly, face still resting in his palms, and he shakes his head. "I really fucked up guys."

"What happened?"

Chris takes his hands away from his face and sighs yet again, not wanting to tell the truth. But he has to.

"Ricky kissed me, and I ended up kinda - kissing back a little,"

"Dude, what?!" Ryan interrupts and both Balz and Chris shoot him a glare, causing him to quiet down. "Sorry."

"Anyway," Chris goes on. "I started kissing him back because - fuck - I think I genuinely do like him, but I've never had a crush on a guy or even been attracted to a guy as much as him, so I freaked out and pulled away and didn't even do anything when he left nearly in tears. To make shit worse, before that he was talking about how his family pretty much kicked him out because he was gay. So I can't imagine me rejecting him like that would make him feel too great."

Chris finishes and Balz and Ryan just look at him, Ryan in shock and Balz looking concerned, biting his lip like he's in thought.

"Told you I fucked up."

The silence is palpable; Chris sitting with guilt written across is face, and both Balz and Ryan not knowing what to say, not used to seeing their friend this vulnerable.

"Could you not just...talk to him?" Ryan asks hesitantly.

Chris rolls his eyes.

"Well yeah, no shit, I've tried that. He won't respond to my messages or calls, and I don't know where he lives to go to his place."

Ryan looks taken aback by Chris snapping at him, and Chris feels bad. 

"I'm sorry, it's just - this whole situation is a mess and I'm pretty stressed right now."

Ryan shrugs, waving him off.

"So..." Balz starts, and Chris looks up at him. "You genuinely like this Ricky guy, huh?"

"Yeah," Chris responds, and suddenly his mind flashes to this morning, thinking of Ricky with his hand on his cock, and he flushes red, then clears his throat. "I definitely like him."

"What is it about him you like so much?" 

"I honestly don't know where to start," Chris says, blushing and scratching the back of his neck nervously. "I guess everything. We have the same taste in music, movies, TV shows, and we can talk for hours on end and I don't get bored."

"And you think he's cute, right?" Balz says smirking, and Chris has to agree, albeit awkwardly.

"Yeah. Like, I've always liked girls who were smaller than me, but I never thought I'd find it cute on a guy until Ricky. He makes me feel like I'm in high school with a crush again - whenever he smiles or looks up at me I feel my pulse get faster and I start to feel nervous. At first I thought I felt nervous around him because I wanted to impress him or something, but it kept on happening every time I was close to him."

When Chris finishes talking, he feels like a heavy weight was just lifted off of his shoulders. Balz his smiling and Ryan is as poker-faced as ever, however Chris can see that his expression has softened a little, and Chris realizes that thinking his friends would hate him for liking a guy was pretty stupid.

"You know everything you just told us? Tell that to Ricky. Even if he doesn't respond, let him know the truth so that he isn't sitting around thinking the worst and blaming himself," Balz advises and Chris nods, determined.

"You're right. If I can be honest with myself and you guys, I should be honest with Ricky."