Dear Diary

„Dear Diary,
I understand why I've been so down lately – it's Dec. He may be insensitive, rude, obnoxious, irritating and stupid but we're made for each other. Dec's all I've ever wanted but now we'll never be together because he's found someone new."

Ant went over his lines for tomorrows episode of Chums again. He had to practise these lines very carefully as to not give away anything. You must know, Ant had been in love with his best friend for some time now and to have to say these words wasn't easy for him. The only thing that wasn't true about these lines are the character traits. Dec is the most sensitive person Ant has ever met, he's lovable, nice and the funniest person Ant knows. And this is why he fell in love with him in the first place.

Ant was dreading tomorrow because he knew how Dec had to react to him saying these words. In rehearsal earlier this morning he found his heart beating fast when Dec laid his finger on his lips. He found it hard to concentrate and wished they could stay like this forever. And hearing Dec say 'I can't deny that there have been times, many many times... Sometimes I sneak into your bedroom at night just to watch you sleep. I... I never washed my clothes when you'd borrowed them...' was just too much for him. How he wished those words were true and Dec felt the same way about him... but it'll never happen because Dec isn't gay. Watching him almost kissing Cat every Saturday hurt and he felt his heart break a little more everytime. He wanted to be able to do that but he couldn't. He can't ruin their friendship and he can't lose Dec forever. Because that's exactly what would happen if Dec found out about his feelings.

A few houses down the road Dec found himself having the same problem as Ant. He was in love with Ant since he was fifteen. And to pretend everything he had to say in this sketch is a joke wasn't easy because every word of it was true. When they were PJ and Duncan and they shared a flat he spent quiet some time in Ant's bedroom just to watch him sleep. And when Ant borrowed his clothes he didn't wash them, not because he wasn't able to use the washing machine but because he liked to smell Ant on his clothes.
Just like Ant, Dec didn't want to risk their friendship by telling his friend about his feelings, so he started dating Clare. Dating is the wrong word though because Clare knew about Decs feelings for Ant from the start and she agreed on helping Dec by pretending to be his girlfriend.

This morning when she saw them rehearse she decided to take matters in her own hands because by the looks of it Dec wasn't the only one in love with his best mate. That's why she's at Cat's right now to ask for help with the plan she came up with. Cat was on board straight away. She too had noticed the tense atmosphere during the Chums rehearsal.

It was saturday morning just before SM:TV started and the girls set their plan into action. Clare took Dec with her to speek to him out of earshot from everyone. Cat did the same with Ant.
'What's up Clare? I need to go, the show starts in a few minutes.'
'I know. It won't take long. I just wanted to give you some advice. When you're doing Chums today focus on Ant's face, will you?'
'Why? What's up with Ant?'
'Just do it okay? Don't worry you will know why, when you do it. And now, good luck with the show.'
With that Clare went to take her seat and left Dec to himself, confused about what he'd just been told.
Cat had a very similar chat with Ant and he too was left confused. But both boys haven't had any time left to think about what the girls meant because the show started.

When it was time for Chums and they got to the part they both dreaded they did exactly what they've been told to. Ant still didn't know why he should focus on Dec's face but Declan soon discovered what Clare had been talking about. He could see the nervousness and the inner turmoil in Ant's eyes. He knew him too well. The only thing he had to figure out now was what made Ant feel like this. He'd never been nervous about doing Chums. Although now thinking about it Ant had been nervous before. In the episode where they lost their memories and had to pretend to go in for a kiss, his best friend looked terrified. In fact in every sketch they had to pretend they were about to kiss or had feelings for each other Ant looked scared. He thought it was just acting but now... Could it be that Ant was in love with him too? Could his dream come true? There was only one way to find out. He had to speak to Anth as soon as possible.

Once the show finished Ant disappeared straight into the dressing room he shared with Dec. He needed to calm down a bit before Dec came in. His heart was still beating way to fast for his liking. It's getting harder and harder for him to hide his feelings for the person he spends nearly every waking hour with.
There was a knock at the door and a voice said,
'Anth can I come in?'
It was Declan.
'Of course mate. It's your dressing room, too.'
The door opened and Dec stood there a little bit nervous. Although he talked to Clare again and she confirmed his suspicions about Ant he was still scared they both read the signs wrong and he would ruin everything.

'What's up mate? You look really nervous. Are you okay?'
'Yeah I'm fine. Don't worry. Just... Don't hate us for what I'm gonna do right now, okay?'
'Why would I hate you, Decky? You're me best friend, I could never hate you.'
Hearing this, Declan started to walk towards Ant and before Ant realised what's going on Dec's lips were on his. When Ant didn't kiss back, Declan pulled away, fearing he did the wrong thing.
'I'm sorry Anth... I... I thought...', but he was cut of by Ant pulling him close and kissing him.
Pulling away, he leant his forhead against Dec's and whispered
'I've wanted you to do this for a long time now so don't apologize. I love you Decky. As more than just a friend.'
'I love you too Anth. I always have.'