Sans x Depressed!Suicidal!Reader

Humorous

Soon enough we arrived at a two story house made of chocolate brown wood, some Christmas decoration, such as lights on the rooftop and pillars and a simple wreath on the front door, laid neatly around it. I smiled as Papyrus placed me back on my feet, I thank him and we wait for mom and Sans to catch up with us, a small silence settles in and feeling uncomfortable with the situation I decided to start a small conversation. 

"You uh, you like Christmas huh?"

Papyrus tilted his head to the side, not really understanding my question, I suppressed a sigh and pointed with my thumb towards his house, "OH! WELL I DO ENJOY IT.", I played with my fingers and wonder if my next question would offend him but I give it a try anyway, "I can see, is that why you have them up already? Y-You know since its September...", somehow he frowned while his hands find a comfortable place on his hips, "IT'S SANS' JOB TO TAKE THEM DOWN BUT HE NEVER DOES IT, HE'S JUST A BAG OF LAZYBONES!" I laughed at his probably unintended pun and attempt of an insult. 

The sound of two pair of feet grab my attention and I turned to look at Sans and Toriel laughing, such sight warms my heart and I can't help but smile, its nice to see mom enjoying herself after being so worried about this small trip. She caught my gaze and a sincere smile makes it way to her face, finally they reach the door and Sans nudged his brother in the ribs, "OH RIGHT!" He opened the door wide enough for us to enter, the warmth of the interior welcomes us and I sighed in delight. 

I have to admit that for a pair of walking skeletons their house is quite cozy! Toriel and I walked into the living room which was quite spacious, probably because there wasn't much furniture around, my eyes landed on a dark green sofa and decide to rest a bit while Papyrus prepares the food. Mom seemed to have a different idea since she went into the kitchen to help the tall skeleton, Sans on the other hand just leaned on the left side of the sofa and almost instantly fell asleep, meanwhile I sat akwardly on the right side of the sofa, trying not to stare and wonder how he can close his eye sockets.

My eyes land on a large wooden table, I raise my eyebrows as I see there's not a single chair around, then I spot a rather colorful rock on a plate; upon further inspection I see that what makes it colorful are sprinkles spread on it, is it some kind of art project? Not wanting to wreck my mind about it I stared at the kitchen door though all I could see and hear was the tiled orange and brown floor and soft laughs of Toriel. Not so far from the kitchen entrance I spotted a sock, probably dirty, with a few sticky notes attached to it, I chuckled slightly as it reminded me of my own mess when I was back on the surface.

A sudden sting in my chest made my heart skip a beat as memories of my life on the human world come flowing back, sure I was bullied and my parents didn't do much about it but...I still missed the good parts of it sometimes, even if they were small. I shook my head to get rid of the negative thoughts, afterall I have a new home! A much better home...My eyes landed on the TV in front of me and then traveled towards a book lonely laying on a small table, from my position all I can see is the title "Jokes For Dummies".

With nothing left to do I leaned on my side of the sofa, after a while I started feeling drowsy and close my eyes, as the sweet embrace of sleep welcomed me a sudden skeleton literally screamed the words "DINNERS READY!" which made my whole body jerk up. After the shoke we sat on the sofa with Sans sitting on the floor, I would've sit on the floor but he offered to since we are the guests but I still felt guilty, while Papyrus gave us our plates in the corner of my eye I could see a certain someone staring at me.

I looked down at Sans until he noticed me staring back which made his gaze wander in front of him, a slight blue hue on his cheek bones. I couldn't help but to laugh a little, mostly 'cause of akwardness but I saw the bue on his face darken and that certainly ticked my funny bone, while trying hard to contain my laughter snot flew out of my nose just as papyrus put my plate down, we all watched as the dark green substance landed gracefully on his hand.

(A/n: Omg this is getting out of hand ,>w<,)
(Fun Fact: "Snot" is the name of a rock band.)

Papyrus face quickly turned into one of panic as he screamed and ran off to the kitchen, which made me laugh harder, Sans couldn't help but to laugh too while mom covered her mouth with tears in her eyes. As Papyrus soaked his hand in bleach the rest of us decided to eat but as soon as I took a bite out of the spaguetti my face did the same expression Papyrus had done seconds ago; it tasted awful. I immediately spit out the food and looked to my right, seeing Toriel not even taste the food, she knew beforehand.

Sans saw how disgusted I was by it and engulfed the food in blue flames which made it disappeared, surprised and relieved I sighed, I thanked him and he replied with a simple "No problem, kiddo." and a wink, not long after he did the same to his food. To be honest I didn't expect him to eat it anyway, he's a skeleton, where would his food go? 

Meanwhile..

The brave and proud leader of the royal guards walked with her head held high while doing her daily routes around the Waterfall when suddenly, out of nowhere, spaghetti splattered all over her shiny grey armor. As the food made its way into her armor and on her blue skin the burning flames of anger grew more intense inside of her, with fists clenched and a menacing stance the soldier was ready to destroy the monster that dared to do such a thing to her. 

"SANS YOU MOTHER FUCKING ASSHOLE".

Now..

(A/n: Another fucking cliff hanger, jk. Madster finish the chap if you like :) no pressure, I just love your way with words ;3 )

(E/n: Aw shush you >w<)~ Hope you enjoyed the chapter, dear Readers!) 
{Edited}