Counting Stars.
A Niam Oneshot
The unfamiliar bed was hard and uncomfortable beneath Liam's back. He kicked off the thin and scratchy bed sheet and rolled onto his side. The faint light of the night-scape outside shone through the window and onto his face. He couldn't sleep so he lay there and watched the stars twinkle.
A creaking of the floorboards behind him was amplified by the silence of the hour but Liam didn't turn around to look. He knew who it was. The bed shifted slightly and yet he remained resolutely on his side, watching the world through his window. This wasn't anything new. He couldn't count how many cold and dark nights like this one he'd been awoken to a smaller body creeping into the sheets next to him. Niall had always had nightmares and Liam had always been there for him. Niall would sneak in, trying his hardest not to wake Liam because he was embarrassed about needing the comfort but he always failed. Liam would roll over and wrap an arm around him, no words needing to be exchanged. They'd lie there breathing softly and Niall's freezing toes would brush Liam's feet, sending shivers through his body.
This time Liam didn't turn around. He'd done too much wrong when it came to Niall lately and he knew that if he rolled over like usual it would ruin the whole thing. So he lay on his side and counted the stars in the night sky. One for each of his mistakes.
There had been so many signs along the way. The two had always been closer than brothers but Liam was self-admittedly obtuse when it came to things like this so it had taken him a long time to see that there was more to it.
He'd been lying on the floor behind the last row of seats after one of their rehearsals when he'd found himself with some unexpected company. Niall simply walked over and lay down next to him, both of them squishing into one another so they would fit side-by-side between the wall and the seats.
"Tired out mate
?"
Liam swatted at him half-heartedly. Niall caught his hand mid-air and held it.
"Not really, just thinking."
"Don't hurt yourself."
He smiled at the weak joke, but Niall couldn't exactly see his face in their position, so it was fairly useless. The younger boy started playing with the hand that he'd captured; twisting his fingers as the silence grew.
"So what're you thinking about all alone back here?"
Using his free hand Liam rubbed his face and let out a breath.
"I'm just having one of those days where I forget why we do all this, and what it's all for. I just feel like we're just blindly following orders for nothing. Do you ever get days like that?"
"Yeah,"
Niall sighed softly. He stopped playing with Liam's fingers and just clasped their hands together and lowered them so their arms were in the space between them. They lay there in that tiny space at the back of the room, next to one another and holding hands and not talking until eventually someone came to find them and told them it was time to go.
That was the moment that he realised there might be something more between them. It was also the moment he realised how much he wanted there to be something more.
After that moment it had been impossible not to be hyper-aware of Niall whenever they were together. He would feel it whenever Niall entered a room he was in, and the two would subconsciously gravitate towards one another until they forgot about everyone else entirely. There always seemed to be light little touches between them and Liam didn't know if they were a result of his realisation of if they'd always been there and he was only just now noticing. He would touch Niall's shoulder in greeting and Niall would grip his forearm as he laughed. One would sling an arm around the other's waist and they would respond by laying their head on their friends shoulder. They were in their little bubble and while they both knew it would eventually pop, they refused to think about it. They just continued to murmur jokes into each other's ears and find excuses to never be separated. Liam didn't know what he expected to come out of it. Their relationship couldn't remain in a stasis like that forever but at the same time he'd never wanted it to change. Taking it further would require jumping obstacles he wasn't ready to think about yet and yet losing Niall would be like losing a limb. He knew it was wrong and that it was dangerous but he let them teeter on the edge of the cliff until inevitably they swayed too far and fell off.
