The Quest for the Holy Coffee Mug

I would like to say that it was just another day in the office. That I came to work, opened up the pharmacy like normal. That I gave customers their prescriptions, or the flu-shot, or even just advice for people who wanted over-the-counter medicine for any number of ailments. I would like to say that, but I can't. It would be more accurate to say that my day was absolutely awful, horrible in every sense of the word.

It all started this morning when my baby woke me up with his crying. My newborn son, Ericson Frederrin Bauer V (technically, his name was Kevin Bauer. My wife did not like the name I wanted to give him. Personally, I thought she should just be lucky I didn't go with my first choice in baby names for boys: Optimus Prime) was only a few months old. He was therefore prone to much crying.

On my way to my babies crib, I ended up stubbing my toe, twice. Ericson (Kevin) kept me up for two hours before going to back to sleep, and I was nearly late for work. To top it all off, I couldn't find my coffee mug.

That last one was the real reason my day was going so poorly. I could deal with crying babies, stubbed toes and a lack of sleep. My coffee mug going missing was another thing entirely.

The coffee mug in question was not at home when I searched for it. It was not in the cupboard where I usually kept it, nor in any of the other cupboards my wife might have put it in. At first, I had merely thought that I had simply left it at work yesterday. It's not a mistake I usually make, not with this coffee mug, but even I am only human. Therefore, the first thing I did upon opening the pharmacy was search my work space for my coffee mug.

It was not there.

I began to panic. My coffee mug was missing, and it was not in the pharmacy. It was not in the pharmacy, it was missing, and I did not know where it was.

Where is my coffee mug?!

“Okay, calm down,” I told myself, speaking out loud. I ignored the customer trying to get my attention for some menial reason. Couldn't they see I had more important things on my mind! “Just take a deep breath. There's no need to panic. Breath in, breath out. In. Out. In. Out. That's it. Now. Think.”

And so I thought. I thought about what I should do to find my coffee mug, and I thought about all of the possible places I might have left my coffee mug. It had to be somewhere inside the store. The only places I ever took my coffee mug to were my house, my car, and Safeway. That was it. I didn't bring it anywhere else, which meant it had to be somewhere around here, inside the store.

With those thoughts in mind, I managed to conceive my first destination.

I ignored the man on the other side of the counter, screaming at me. I was now on a quest; a quest to find my coffee mug, and no two-bit customer was going to stop me!

Starbucks

The first destination in my itinerary was Star Bucks. It was the most logical place I could think of. I got my coffee from Star Bucks, so it would only make sense that I left it there. Right?

Wrong.

“I'm sorry,” the woman behind the counter, Griselda, said after I had told her about my missing coffee mug and asked if she had seen it. “But I haven't seen it this morning. Are you sure you haven't just misplaced it? I saw you with it yesterday.”

“No,” I shook my head, “I would never misplace my coffee mug.” Then again, I would have never forgotten my coffee mug either, so that didn't mean much. “Are you sure it wasn't left here? Maybe one of the other employees put it in one of the cabinets or the fridge or something.”

“I could look.”

Doing just that, Griselda checked all of the fridges and cabinets inside the little Star Bucks stand. She even checked the storage room, where all of their cups and other supplies were stored.