Awoken

   My eyes open, startled, awake, hungry. I quickly sit up and take in my surroundings. I'm in a dark room, lying on what seem to be a table. Why am I here? How did I get here? I question myself. My head starts to thump as though a hangover is setting in. "Arrgh!" I sit up and put my hands on my head, my elbows on my knees. I sit like this for a while, gathering myself. I look around. I can feel presence. Presence lurking somewhere here in the dark. I feel angry, sly, vicious even. I'm not normally like this. I'm hungry but I don't know what for. Then i see him, standing there in the shadows, standing there watching me like I'm some kind of experiment, standing there startled. He knows I see him. He walks over to me. He looks like he's been crying. He circles me a few times, jaw opened, wondering, his brown eyes wide. Yes Stefan, looking at me like he's never seen me before. It's irritating me.

"Well? Are you going to stop looking at me like that?" I snap.

"Sorry. It's just..." He trails off, still walking in circles around me, still with the expression on his face.

"It's just what?"

"You should be dead." He stops. Stops everything. Stops walking, stops talking, stops living. It's as though he's a photograph, just recently took, still developing. It's as though the flash has stunned him.

"I'm sorry?!" I glare at him, stunned at what he just said. I should be dead? He's deluded. How could I, how should I?... My thoughts trail off as I start to remember... Start to remember how the car went off Wickery Bridge with me and Matt still inside. Start to remember how we were trapped, the water level in the car rising as we sunk. Start to remember how Matt struggled to get the door open, struggled to get the door open, struggled to stay alive. Start to remember how I tried to save us but failed. Start to remember how Stefan was here, in the water with us, pulling open the door trying to get to me. Start to remember how I told Stefan to leave me and save Matt, just like my father had done with me. Start to remember how they were gone. Start to remember how the lights slowly started to fade out of my eyes. Start to remember how I stopped struggling, stopped trying. Start to remember how I died...

It starts to sink in.

My breathing is becoming heavy, i'm starting to shake. I know what's happening. I know from previous experiences with Vicki and Caroline why my head is sore, why I feel hungry, what i'm hungry for. I know what I am, or what I am becoming.

"What did you do to me!" I scream at Stefan. "What did you do!"

"I didn't do anything! I swear Elena." He tries to plead back.

"You must have done something Stefan, or else I wouldn't be here right now!"

"Elena. I'm just as shocked as you are. You must have had vampire blood in your system when you died. Do you remember taking any?" He's trying to be calm, keep me calm, but it sure as hell ain't working.

"No! Why would I do that Stefan?" I can feel myself staring to cry as I reach hysteria. "You know I don't want this Stefan, you always knew!"

"I know Elena, I know. I just don't understand how you could have came back if you hadn't taken any vampire blood... It's impossible..." There is a look of pain in his eyes, pain for me, pity for me, he feels sorry for me, he knows I didn't want this... Yet there is also a look of relief to his face, relief that i'm still alive, or I am partially.

I'm still breathing heavy, sitting on this table. I look around some more, hoping that this is just a dream. I squeeze my eyes shut and open them again and look around me, still here. I try again, desperately hoping to wake up. Wake up Elena! Wake up! Still nothing.

Stefan's phone rings, I turn my head in an instant and stare at him taking the phone out of his leather jacket. The one he was wearing when we first met. Damon. I instantly think.

"Hello?"

I can vaguely make out whats on the other side, just vaguely, but I know it's Damon.

"Oh! Damon. Umm well... we have a problem."

"No let me speak first, I really think you need to hear this..." He sounds serious but my headache stops me from hearing the rest of what Damon is going to say.

"You've solved my problem." I hear Stefan say after what seems like eternity.

What does he mean problem? Does he mean me? He knows whats going on now, he has to!

Stefan ends the call and puts his phone back in his jacket pocket.

He stares at me. I pleadingly stare back.

"What does he know Stefan... What does Damon know..."

He sits down beside me. I get ready for what i'm about to hear.

"Well." He starts. "You remember being in the hospital right?" I nod. "Turns out that you didn't just faint Elena, it wasn't concussion."

"Well what was it then?" I demand.

He sighs... "It was a brain hemorrhage Elena."

Again I am shocked to hear this news.

"Meredith gave you vampire blood to keep you alive, that's how you died with it in your system, that's why your sitting here alive right now.

"I need to find her!" I start to stand up but then collapse in pain back down on the table, one hand on my head the other over my mouth. I can feel a ripping sensation in my gums as though something is trying to push through. Fangs. "It hurts Stefan. It really hurts!" I'm crying now, Stefan's arms enclose me, his chin lying on my head as I curl into him.

"You need blood."

"No!" I yell.

"Elena you need it or you'll die."

"Then let me die! I was supposed to die, it's fate Stefan. I was supposed to die today. Anyway everything will be better here without me. No more arguments caused. No more doppelganger. No more Elena Gilbert to fight over."

"I'm not going to let you die Elena, not again."

He gets up and runs fast, vampire fast. He's back within an instant with a blood bag in his hand. He tears open the top. I start to back away. "No! You can't make me! You can't make me drink it Stefan." But i'm weak. Too weak to fight back. He has already forced the blood into my mouth.

Everything's much brighter and heightened as i hold onto the bag for dear life, my vampire instincts have taken over and I can no longer fight the impulse. I drain every last drop of blood out of the bag, squeezing it for more, but there is no more. What did I just do. What did I just do. I'm angry with myself, for giving in, for giving up. Angry for what she has done to me. I get up, my eyes red, fangs out and start to walk off. Stefan follows. Who knows now what I might do.

I must find her and when I do... Oh! When I do... A look of pure evil is on my face. She made me this way. She deserves to pay, and she will.