Me and Megan stopped dating. No more of what was happening. My crush on Danny ended, I have moved on, me and Damien are dating again. We have been together since December 20th, 2017. It's now February 28th, 2018. So I have had anxiety for a long while, but it's really bad now, I even have depression. And I keep falling depression and deeper into my depression, "It;s easy to fake a smile when you've been doing it for awhile" that's a song lyric to "Little Game" by Benny. I can relate to that quote, can any of you? Anyway, back on topic, along with my depression I have become suicidal. My suicidal thoughts have gotten so bad that I even started writing suicide notes. I even starve myself. My friends Emily, Sarah, Danny, and I have all agreed to do an assistant suicide, where we all have guns(with silencer) pointed at each other(one person has gun pointed to each other's head in full circle/square) and all pull the trigger at once. We even know the location, Emily's house. We are gonna have our notes with us, and we are gonna lock the door before the deed is done. I'm done with this invisible force messing with me all the time, life. I'm done having my heart strings played with. I'm done being stepped on like a door mat. I'm done with pretending to be ok. I'm done pretending to be happy. I'm done with being pushed around. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm sorry everyone, but I can't stop my true feelings.
The following songs are what I listen to daily.
Her last words: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TtHZs4GrarY
Dark enough: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNGEpjXxS10
Please eat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxUflxv1v1g
My smile is extinct: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5N-NGpsaFM
YOU ARE READING
Broken Heart
Non-FictionBased on a true story of what I'm currently going through, but I changed the names. I wanted to write this when my sister started to play "So what" by P!NK.
