The shadows search

My reasoning

I technically didn't break any rules by doing this I mean not right off the bat for my carrier had not been born. So in no way did this interfere with his "life" but I've watched him die one to many times.

See the thing they never say is we the shadows follow you forever just to watch you die. Over and over and over again the same person recreated but you'll never remember us. Until you die again and again and again and again starting all over till you live perfect enough to be sent with the lights. Our job is not easy not by a long shot and unlike the lights, we don't choose anything. We are all the same for each person just sitting suffering as we watch you redo all your mistakes knowing we have to put you through it all again.

I guess I did break the rule of not having an emotional attachment to my carrier but I was made fun of for he had died a total of ninety-six billion, eight hundred ninety-five million, four hundred thirteen thousand, seven hundred seventy-seven times that's twenty billion, three hundred fifty-four million, forty-four thousand, three hundred forty-five more than the average shadow has to deal with I actually set the record by nine hundred more than anyone else. Still, I had to watch him die without interference. So if that's not horrible, to begin with, what really pushed me over the edge was him on his hands and knees tears streaming begging me to do something
"no no no more please I can't do this anymore PLEASE I'LL DO ANYTHING JUST HELP m..*strangled gasping and coughing* ..e"
I couldn't do it anymore not after that. There was a Shadow slightly younger who'd been following us as a sibling, I'm pretty sure it was more of a guard to keep me from doing exactly what I did.