For the first time in past two years was Lilly feeling weak. Like
someone came with a spoon and tapped on her rough rind until it broke.
Well, it wasn't just someone, it was Jim. Extremely hot and rugged yet
still sweet and carying lifeguard from CA public swimming pool. She
din't know if she felt happy, that someone finally discovered who she
really is inside or scared, because it was something she never felt
before. of course there were some guys, but she has never really
cared. Most of her time she spent ''home'' reading books or writing
her own little stories. That's another thing she told Luke but noone
else. Her stories were her private little universe, just for her and
nobody else. And now, he was sitting right in front of her and begging
to read at least one of those many stories. She finally succumbed.
Blast in his chocolate brown eyes was just too much for her. However
she had one requirement. She's going to be the one who's going to read
it out loud. She wanted to keep this little priviledge for herself. So
she started reading. With every paged she was opening to him even
more.
,,Only thing she could thing about was if it was worth it. Let someone
own you a give this person the power to break your heart yet trusting
him not to do it. For a girl who was use to take care of herself and
only herself it was almost impossible to do. Showed up it wasn't worth
it. ,Was it true what were you telling me?' she asked. ,Almost' he
replied. But she knew, almost is never enough.She realized, love is
just a wasting of time. Nothing lasts forever, everything ends
someday. Some endings are happy, some are sad, but non of them is as
painful as broken heart is.'' finished Lilly, closed the journal and
looked at Jim with an expectation in her eyes. For a minute, which
felt like an infinity, non of them said a word. Finally Jim hawked and
said:,,Wow, you're such a good writer. I didn't know that.''
,,I haven't told anyone before. You're the first one, you should feel
special.'' she replied.
,,I do. Because I am special just by myself if you haven't noticed yet.''
,,You're so bumptious Clarke, you know that, right?'' said Lilly and laughed.
,,I don't know what you're talking about, Moore.'' replied Jim with so
much arogance in his voice that Lilly flipped one's lid and fell off
the bed, which caused that Jim attached to her laughter. When they
finally calmed down, Jim stood up and walked out the room. He turned
back at her, blinked and said:,,Tomorrow after school on our usual
place like always, Moore?''
,,Like always'' replied Lilly.
Their usual place is a little remote sushi restaurant in the CA mall. They had the best temakizushi in the world.
,,I'm finally free." said Jim aftet they ordered. ,,I passed all the exams, i'm free"
Lilly simpered:,,Nobody's free. Society gives us the illusion of choice so we have something to hold on to when we're down. See, the thing is we don't have a choice. We've never had. Maybe we can choose what type of meat we're going to eat for dinner but in general we're like robots. We are taught to do certin thing since we were born and it's rootednet in our minds to make us feel little less like animals. All this bullshit about free country and no discrimination is making me sick."
,,I love when you talk smartish." laughted Jim.
,,Smartish is not a word. And this is not funny. People are manipulated by social media, newspapers and religion. It's a serious problem." She said seriously but couldn't help it and started laughting too.
