This time when I park outside the prison and stumbled towards the main entrance, the security guard doesn't stop me.
I'm hysterical, but I don't allow myself to cry. I slid into the building and storm up to the front desk. "Back for Dolan so soon?" The same lady behind the desk glances at the clock, bewildered. It's like 7 in the morning.
I ignore her, heading straight for the elevator.
Death sentence.
Why did he not tell me?
The Correctional Officer jolts from his so when I grab him by his arm.
"I need to see Ethan now."
ETHAN'S POV
Addy comes at me with a force of a whirlwind the moment the doors of my cell crack open.
I scramble to sit up in bed and stand but she hurls herself into my arms, knocking the breath out of me as she buries her head into my chest and starts to cry.
I lean back in bed and press my lips against the crown of her head. What happened? "Shhhh." I murmur, rubbing her back in slow circles. She's still wearing my shirt. I breathe in deeply, taking in her scent.
I'm going to miss this when I'm gone.
Addy pushes away, I lift my hands to frame her face. Her eyes are tired and red rimmed. She swallows and starts to speak, her voice thick with tears.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
ADELAINE'S POV
Silence settles over us.
"I don't want you to be sad Addy." Ethan finally says.
"No," I choke out. I want Ethan to start laughing and tell me he's just kidding. But he lowers his gaze. "Tell me this is a joke, please tell me this is a joke." I sob, my tears drowning my words.
Ethan pulls me into an embrace again. I turn my head into his chest, my tears matting the fabric of his shirt.
"I killed people." I glance up at Ethan the moment he starts to speak. He stares straight ahead with glassy eyes, his fingers trailing down my back.
"Six months ago I was admitted into this facility, to wait out my trial for man slaughter. The court passed me a death sentence a couple of weeks ago. I was ready to accept it all these 6 months."
"They called you in to counsel me the day after the judge passed the sentence. They were afraid I could not deal with the sentence."
"I am charged for first degree murder on 5 counts." Ethan states.
I swallow.
"Her name was Kayla, she was the captain of the cheerleading team. We were going one year strong. I loved her."
My heart picks up speed.
"I had a best friend. He and I went way back, to pre school years. He was the closest buddy I had other than my twin brother. We played on the schools football team. We planned on getting into the same university by relying on scholarships."
"Kayla and I, we talked a lot about the future, we were serious as a couple. I never thought I could love someone as much as I loved her. But she fucked Jordan behind my back. She fucked my best friend." Ethan's voice breaks.
"I found them in the science lab the next day, fooling around. I straight up confronted Jordan, he fought back hard. I was injured and he had the upper hand, I got so mad I-I-" Ethan blinks faster.
"One thing led to another and I stabbed him. Over and over, with a scalpel. There was blood everywhere. All over me, all over my hands." I glance down at Ethan's hand resting on my thigh, and I squeeze my eyes shut.
"Kayla was screaming, she had a gun out from her bag and in her hands, like a glock. Her dad was an officer, he made her carry that in case of an emergency. She threatened to shoot me if I moved."
"I lunged forward to stop her and we struggled, the trigger went off once and the next moment she was on the ground with a bullet through her stomach. Kayla was screaming and crying, blood seeping from the corners of her mouth."
"She made terrible noises from the back of her throat, choking on her own blood. She cried for me to help her, so I gave her what she needed at that moment."
Ethan's hand slides from my thigh, I watch him curl his fingers and lift his hand to his temple. He presses the tip of his index finger to his temple, imitating a gun.
"I shot her," Ethan smiles and pained smile, his voice faltering as his eyelashes spike with tears, "I shot her here."
I close my eyes so my head stops spinning. I imagine the fingers trailing down my spine pulling the trigger on some girl he loved.
I imagine his arm wrapped gently around my waist, wrapped around a scalpel and stabbing his best friend. I shiver.
"I ran home, delirious and shaken. My mom took a look at my bloodstained clothes and the glock in my hand and she called the police." Ethan squeezes his eyes shut. "I shot all of them, my mother, my father, my sister. "
There was a pause.
"Grayson escaped. But I've not seen him in months, until a few weeks ago at the trial where they passed my death sentence. I assume that will be the last time I will be seeing him before I die."
Ethan pulls away from me and runs his fingers along he wall by his bed. I squint, my eyes are adjusting to the darkness and then I see them. Tally marks. The whole wall is lined with them.
"I have one month and a couple of days left. After I'm gone, the next inmate in here will see these tally marks and think: wow, lucky bastard counted only seven months to his freedom. But he's wrong. I'm just counting down the days to my death."
"If you still love me, forget about that one month," Ethan tucks a strand of hair behind my ear gingerly, "we can make every day count."
"If you don't love me anymore, I understand." He whispers. "I'm sorry Addy, for coming into your life in a time like this. But it's never too late to leave."
"I didn't want a fucking counsellor in the first place, we shouldn't have met." Ethan slams his first against the wall. I jump.
"I don't even know why I love you so much Addy, I can't help it, I'm sorry." He passes a hand over his eyes. "Before I met you, I was perfectly okay with dying. I had nothing to lose, there was nothing much I felt a need to live for."
"You changed me Addy, you really did. I hate to admit this, but I find myself doing anything just to get extra time with you, to express how I feel. It's fucking difficult for me. I find myself changing for you."
"And now I don't want to die." Tears streak down his cheeks. "I'm scared Addy. I'm scared of dying. I don't want to lose this."
Ethan slides his fingers between mine, interlocking our hands like how I did during our first counselling session. "I'm scared," his body heaves with sobs.
"Every single day passing means one less day I get to spend with you," he coughs, "and I'm scared of that."
Ethan ducks his head, composing himself. "I think you should leave Addy. I would rather you leave me, than I leave you. Leave."
I bolt from the cell, hand clamped over my mouth, biting down to keep myself from sobbing out loud.
I leave Ethan behind.
YOU ARE READING
Prisoner {ethan dolan} (re-upload of oreolovinq)
Fanfiction"I was scared to love him because it wasn't right" For those who didn't read it before it was deleted :)