"A young gladiator has sold himself into his profession: fighting for crowds. He finds himself slipping down the ranks further and further, until he is forced into death matches. However, someone or something is watching him; he sees a pair of silver eyes next to the arena ring week after week, and they somehow help him to succeed. In the final showdown, the extent of the eyes' loyalty is put to the test."
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Cover: At first glance, the cover gives the idea of the silver eyes, but doesn't really show the gladiatorial scenery. Though, your description helps when it states it's first words "A younggladiator...". Also, the cover is a bit bland but acceptable. Something clever of you I noticed was that the "black mark E-looking symbol" is the "E" of "Eyes" in the cover. Another part of me feels like the different fonts of the words seem off with each other. So, I say the cover is a 3.5 out of 5 stars.
Title and Decription: When I first read the title and the decription, I got the idea easily (that's a good thing) that it's about the silver eyes being something of good, bad, mystery and so forth. I also felt the suspense the ending of the description gave me of wanting to read the actual book. The title is also strait to the point. Rating of Title and Decription: 5 out of 5.
Genre: Short Story (Action/Mystery based) I say the story fitted nicely under the genres stated. It was only 3 chapters long and somewhat easy to read. The describing of the action was there, though you might want to find a way to flow the scenes where the gladiator, Killion, is seeing the eyes along with the action of him fighting together. Overall: 5 out of 5 of genre choice.
Reading of First Chapter: I like how right away the reader is in the action of Killion's POV, but I feel like it was thrown out there too "harsh and rushed" persay, though that gives the adrenaline the reader needs to feel the story. I like how you describe more than saying "I" all the time; especially that this is a first-person POV story in the view of one character. I also like how the reader doesn't know the name until it's told later in the story; giving the little mystery feel of "Who is this person?".
Grammer/Punctuation, etc: Seems all good, though might need a double-check.
Characters: I can tell that it's one main character right away. I'm assuming he is a flat/static character throughout the story. Also, I can tell what kind of character he is and his personality. Though, if this was a longer; actual novel, I would like to know more about him,he seem too indirectly introduced, but as this is a short story, I say how he's introduced and how it ends for him, it's great. Other characters seem like just your typical "one-scene" charcters and that's fine. As for the silver eye character, how you show the plot twist is good but a bit rickety (About the end of the 3rd chapter). Might want to rewrite/edit a little. Overall, the silver eye character characteristics is fine. Characterization score: 4 out of 5
Setting: Like I said earlier before, the cover doesn't show that scenery feeling, but your describing helped. I could tell what's going on in the setting and where the characters are. Scoring: 4 out of 5
What You Mainly Wanted Focused On: Pacing. A bit forced in the begining and like I said before, try to flow the physical action of the fights along with Killion's internal thoughts of him seeing eyes better. A teeny bit of cringe writing on some spots that slows down the flow of reading. All together, it's well. Side note: I don't really like how the chapters are named. I get it that they're different days, battles, and moments of the silver eyes, but something about the names doesn't feel right. Though, I know people who like short story chapters named like as if they were different books, so I say it's fine.
Overall Thoughts: I say it's a good story. It's great for something quick with action and a little bit of mystery. I would recommend this if you also like something historical fiction-y. Although, I admit that I'm more of a realistic/adventure/sci-fi reader. So I give this book a 3 out of 5 stars overall.
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Story: Silver Eyes by VinStars ( VinStars) Genre: Short Story (Action/ Mystery Based) Length: 3 chapters, 900 average word count.
~Any info, other things you wanted me to review/ critique that I forgot, please let me know.
