gift from hell •文豪ストレイドッグス•

Chapter 1

"Excuse me, could you explain to me what exactly this is?" I demanded with a smile, motioning to the bloody mess of the Port Mafia's dungeon.

The man in front of me trembled in fear as I began to back him into the wall, of course he knows he screwed up really bad this time.

"A-ah um, t-t-the b-bodies of the c-criminals, ma'am." He stuttered, the hand gripping his gun beginning to turn white and sweat trickling down his neck.

"Yes, I can see that." I growled.
"But what I'm asking is what exactly happened here."
"If I recall correctly, I gave you specific orders to keep them alive, right?"
"Oh- Could it be, that you disobeyed my orders on purpose?"

"N-n-n-no ma'am of c-course not!" The man squeaked, jumping at the sudden accusation.

"Or maybe, did you lure me here to kill me?" I suggested, getting closer into the man's face.
"I'm right here, you have a loaded gun, you can shoot me easily, can you not?"

He broke into a disgusting grin, clicking the safety off of his gun and pointing it at me. "So you've seen through me, but it's too late, I don't have to obey orders from someone like you, I'll kill you right her-"

His threat was cut short as he collapsed onto the ground, a scream choked in his throat as the bang of my own gun echoed through the empty room.

"Useless." My tone turned dark.
"I'll teach you something, in your next life, learn to shut your filthy mouth and stop blabbering about useless shit."
"The Port Mafia has no need for idiots like you."
---
"God I shouldn't have killed him, however much of a pain he was being." I groaned, slumping over the large pile of papers on my desk, a couple falling onto the floor.
"All that did was give me all this paperwork to do..."

"Ah, I should go drinking." I thought, standing up and stretching my arms and legs a bit after picking up the fallen papers.

I picked up my coat and headed to my favourite bar. Sitting down on one of the empty barstools, I ordered my usual, along with a huge ball of ice in it.

After a few sips and a slightly clearer mind, I heard the jingle of door opening footsteps. Turning to look, I found the one and only, other mafia executive, suicidal maniac, Dazai Osamu. His ability, No Longer Human, allows him to nullify other abilities with a touch. His list of deeds writ in darkness and blood, it's enough to make even those in the mafia tremble.

"Ah, Sydney-chan!" The banaged freak exclaimed, coming over to sit in the seat beside me."

"Please don't call me by my name so casually, and my English one at that." I told him.
"Besides, who gave you the permission to sit there?"

"Ah, would you like to commit a double suicide with m-" He began to ask, interrupted by my fist landing on the top of his head.

"No." I replied, taking another sip of my drink.
"Would you like me to turn you into one giant immobile skeletal shape?"

"Well, I suppose my ability would have no use against you..." I thought.

The door jingled again, informing us of the entry of another person, or Mafioso, to be specific. Oda Sakunosuke, the "weakest" member in the Port Mafia. His ability, Flawless, allows him to see a few seconds into the future when something bad is gonna happen.

"Hey, Odasaku!" Dazai greeted, as the man took up a seat beside him.

We talked about the various stuff that happened today, Dazai being involved in a shootout and his bullshit story of tripping in a ditch while needing to pee, although Oda seemed to believe it... Or did he?