A stray snowflake drifted into my eye. It startled me from a sort of trance I had been in for the past few minutes. I realised I was staring again, and quickly looked away. Hopefully she wouldn't notice. I couldn't understand it, the way my heart fluttered whenever I looked at her, and wouldn't do so with anyone else. I hoped my friends wouldn't notice either, otherwise I'd get all sorts of hell from them. Shaking my head to clear the snow, I turned from the school gate and onto the familiar road that would take me all the way home.
Home was a small house with a small garden for a small family, but it was, well, home. My room, upstairs beside the bathroom, was small too, but cosy. A bed with heaps of clothes scattered haphazardly around it, was my refuge from the world. A desk, full of papers and pens and various other non-related bits, sat in a corner. In another corner, an old couch gathered dust (and more clothes). From someone else's point of view this would look really disorganised, but from mine, everything was perfect. I didn't need to spend minutes looking through my closet for the shirts I would wear, nor through pencil cases for the same pens I always use. Everything had their rightful place, even if it didn't seem like it.
The same went for my family. Alone, we were a strange bunch of people, but together we complemented each other the way only a family could. My father used to be a fireman. When I was a kid, I would remember playing with his helmet, fighting imaginary fires with my action figures. He would come home late most days, exhausted but happy. Now he stayed at home, and was always in his shed at the end of the garden. He wanted to become a carpenter, and from his carvings of ships and gnomes and all sorts of other things he would provide income for his retirement.
My mum wanted to be a nurse. After giving birth to me, she went back to university and got her Masters degree, but couldn't find any work. Then she got pregnant with my sister Lily and had to stay home. Right now, both of them just keep the house orderly and help out around the neighbourhood.
Lastly, Lily was the once that lifted everyone's spirits up. She was 6, and was very mature for her age. She could always make anyone smile, and she was the typical six year old worrying about dolls and wanting to be a ballet dancer. I think she was our parents' favourite, but I didn't mind. She was my favourite as well, and it wasn't as if I was unwanted, so I was alright with it.
There was another girl that played a big role in my life, ever since having first met her about four years ago. Her name was Evie. She had golden brown hair a little longer than shoulder length, and in winter she always wore this knitted hat that I assumed her grandmother had knitted. Her eyes were opal green, and glinted with her treasure trove of thoughts in her mind. It wasn't just appearance that caught my eye however. It was her way of...living. She wasn't one of the popular girls, or even one of the prettiest (although she was quite pretty by my standards). She wasn't awkward or anything, but just quiet and reserved, and a lot of the time she was alone. I didn't understand why, nobody was pushing her away from what I saw, but she didn't make any effort to integrate with any groups.
I talked to her once, in Year 8. I remember that day, it was pretty...embarrassing. We were sitting next to each other in Maths because the teacher wanted to change the seating plan or something, and we somehow got paired up. There was this problem on the board, and I had solved it easily while she was struggling. She had asked me for help, and at that moment i froze up. I didn't know why. My face was flustered, my breath caught in my throat. I had squeezed out a short "I don't know, I'm sorry", and turned away abruptly. I didn't know why I had done so, and I was just as affronted by my reaction as she was. I was normally comfortable around girls, so why had this happened with her? I didn't have a crush on her...did I?
Anyway, the past was the past and I'd hoped she'd forgotten it by now. I dumped my bag by my desk and immediately crashed onto my bed for a nap. Today had been exhausting, and all I wanted to do was sleep.
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Sun. Wait. Sun? I opened my eyes to see the bright morning sunshine glitter on the raindrops that had frozen on my window overnight, leaving trails of ice snaking up and down the glass. I looked at my alarm clock, it read 10:37. I had slept through the night, and my stomach rumbled to confirm this. Still, it wasn't too late for breakfast, and I could still get a few things done before lunch.
As I got up, I looked out the window to the beautiful landscape. Fresh white snow covered every inch of the garden, and the hedges wore a layer of snow like a little hat. A couple of robins flit about around the trees, which were bare except for patches of white on top of the branches. The sky was empty of clouds, leaving the sun to shine down illuminating everything. The cat was nowhere to be seen, but she was probably ambling about somewhere searching for mice. All the snow sparked a memory in my mind: I remember Lily saying she wanted to build a snowman a few days ago but we'd never gotten round to actually doing it, and knowing her split-second changes of opinion, we'd never get round to doing it.
After showering quickly and throwing pants and a random shirt on, I went downstairs for breakfast. As always, the fridge was full of food but there was nothing to eat. I was too lazy to make toast or get a bowl out from the cupboard, so I grabbed a yoghurt and walked around as i ate it, almost spilling it all over Lily as she pranced around the living room.
"Ballet again?" I chuckled, as she twirled and jumped to the music of some famous waltz.
"Of course!" She answered, "Love it love it love it!!"
She was getting better, I had to admit. A couple of months ago she could barely balance on her tiptoes, and now I saw her twirling on one foot like she was born for this. Maybe she was, I didn't know what life had in store for her. Or for me, for that matter. Life was just a long road trip to heaven (hopefully) and I didn't have a GPS. The thought of a life with no purpose scared me, and put me in a somber mood for the rest of the day.
