Hidden Hope

Chapter 2

Beginning to peddle out of the parking lot, I concentrate on the pounding lyrics as a distraction from the glares ruthlessly burning holes into my frame. The only reason I can come up with to excuse the behaviour of my peers is that they are unaccustomed to having someone, with an immensely lower standard of living, get identical opportunities in life.

I glance up at the grey sky after hearing a distinct rumbling sound. Sighing inwardly, my feet begin to move as fast as possible. A drop of water hits my nose and it is closely followed by many more. My hands tighten on the handle bars in frustration. How is it that today of all days it has to rain?? I stop the bicycle abruptly to lift my hoodie over my head, preventing my earphones from getting drenched to the point of no repair. Calves burning painfully as I eventually skid to a halt outside the block of undeveloped apartments I have stayed in since she left. This apartment can never be labelled as my home because of the revolting memories that fill my mind every time I enter that door. Memories that should only belong in uncontrollable nightmares. It is more of a destination used for shelter before a more permanent, welcoming place is stumbled upon. How can it be called home with such a broken family?

Jogging up the countless stairs, I'm in a rush to get undressed from the wet fabric that is plastered uncomfortably to me like a second skin. On the way to a much needed shower I glimpse at myself in the wall-length cracked mirror. A reminder of the time his forcefull blow narrowly missed my head and landed instead on that very mirror. Staring back at me is a young girl with untameable, light brown curls peaking out from either side of the hoodie. The strands of hair frame a tanned face made up of oval-shaped hazel coloured eyes which are framed with dark eyelashes, a pointed nose and full, nibbled on lips. The only feature that catched my attention completely are those eyes. Swirling with emotions of pain, desperation and hopelessness. A broken girl in front of a broken mirror.

The vision makes me rush into the bathroom,  that is in much need of a complete makeover, to peel off my clothes. Creating a slight distraction from the unsettling view of myself. As usual the shower takes place while my eyes are purposefully diverted from healing bruises and permanent scars. The water cascades down my back and the delightful heat causes my tense muscles to relax slightly. Massaging my scalp with my favourite shampoo leaves a lingering scent of mint. My absolute favourite. Realision dawns on me that the man who has left an imprint on my daily nightmares could arrive any second now. That one thought alone causes me to scramble out of the shower. I cloth my body but the dampness from my long locks seeps into the oversized hoodie causing shivers to vibrate through me at a steady pace. Other random pieces of clothing are frantically shoved into a duffel bag before I slide it swiftly under my bed and out of eye sight. The bedroom door is slammed roughly on its hinges and the startling action makes me jump a few feet into the air.

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My father's over powering structure staggers into the room instantly causing my fragile body to begin shaking in fear. Attempting to form words to beg him not to touch me is useless, as usual the only sound that escapes my lips are a few weak whimpers. With every large step he takes towards me, I take two small ones back. As a result I trip over my own two feet and clumsily collapse on the hard ground, putting my arms out to hopefully take most of the impact.

My attempt to scramble out of the vulnerable position is not what he wants. Clearly expressed by a  harsh kick to my empty stomach. Clenched up and curled into a ball, I bite my lip to suppress the groan of pain from the impact to my ribs. He drags me roughly by my long curls towards the bed but struggles to do so with the demonic liquid that runs through his veins. In annoyance every inch of my quivering body is pounded, kicked, brutally marked while hot tears streak down my cheaks. My lip is continually bitten until the metallic taste of blood fills my mouth. He suddenly stops and relief floods my body in the hope that exhaustion has overtaken and the beatings will come to an end for the night.

Realisation dawns on me that loud footsteps exiting the room have not yet been heard. My head whips up and what meets my eyes leaves me trembling  uncontrollably. The man I once called daddy slides his belt from around his waist with a sickening smirk and a gleam of anticipation shining in his beady eyes. Before I have a chance to react the metal buckle lands on my delicate skin and I hiss out in pain. A few more harsh impacts to my sensitive skin causes black dots to begin clouding my vision. For the umpteenth time I wish for the darkness to overcome so I am no longer present mentally. Before my dignity is once again ripped away in every way possible. The lashes stop but heart clenching sobs rack my form at is what to come.

As of routine a blindfold is placed tightly over my pleading eyes, so he will not be swayed by the pain and desperation in them. Clothes are pulled off my body, while I thrash wildly with every ounce of strength I have left. A movement done in vain. Eventually laying completely naked for him to do with me what he pleases. "You're nothing in this world little girl. You don't deserve the voice you have been given. Nobody wants to hear the worthless shit that comes out of that dirty mouth. What a little slut. It'll do you good to remember where you stand." His words hurt more than anything else. Words that have found a home engraved in my thoughts. Words that remind me just how useless I'll always be.

The feeling of his calloused hands roaming my body causes me to gag slightly.  Bile would certainly be travelling up my throat if there were contents resting in me. The heavy body laying on my body crushes my petite form. What is meant to give pleasure, provided an emotional burden. The piece of cloth is eventually ripped off my face, informing me that I am done being used for now. Immediately my small hands rush to hide my exposed flesh. "You look just like her",he mutters. I look up in exhaustion at him through half shut lids, before a heavy foot lands on my face roughly and the darkness I begged for overtakes.

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Hey readers. So I hope you're enjoying the book so far. It took me a while to update, just been a bit busy. HAPPY NEW YEAR BTW❤❤😏 Hope 2018 is everything you've wished for and more. Please comment, share and  vote.
XXX,
Mo.