Hello,
My name is Miranda Govelern. I am 25 years old, and I currently live in Baltimore. When I was eleven years old, I always got picked on because apparently nobody wants to be around a troll. My parents made cases worse, they were of no help. Days passed, I couldn't believe how I was criticised. I couldn't find it in me to accept the fact that I was criticised because of my looks.
I could not believe that I was criticised because I was black. Most of all, I could not find it in me to believe that I was bullied because I was just simply being me and not caring about what the people thought of me. I always wondered, why do people hate? Sure sometimes I get on your nerves, sure sometimes I get too comfortable, but... Everybody does that.
I don't like to think this way, 'sure I've wronged you, but what about the other number of countless people that have pissed you off?' people judge you based on what you are or what you have, just so they can make themselves feel better. In year three, I used to have a friend name Bentley. She was what you would call beautiful, everybody loved her but not me... Not anymore. As time passed we became best friends, something came up and I was drawn into the matter and not only that but I was also blackmailed. Bentley started to hate me, she swore on her life she'd never ever forgive me. She shared my deepest secrets, people used my weakness against me. They called me every single bad word that came to their mind, as time passed, I grew mature, I got used to the names. But I was heartbroken, depressed, numb, criticised, bullied. I tried speaking to my mom about it but she waved it off, my dad was never really at home. And he never liked being bothered about anything if it wasn't business related. In grade 10, things got worse. I was cutting, I got beat up and I was a total outcast. I never looked forward to school, I never looked forward to stepping out of the house. Finally I graduated, five years later... My dad died in a plane crash. My mom was devastated, she could not live with it. She left me all alone... She committed suicide. I moved to Baltimore, where my aunt stayed. She got tired of me, she rented an apartment. Yep! She was pretty much tired of me, I mean nobody wants bad vibes right? All I wanted was for someone to just hug me tightly and tell me "it's alright, I'm here to help... I feel your pain". Well growing up as an only child, I had no siblings to do that for me.
The internet trolls, we all know there's nothing we can do about them. It's their thing, I made a vow that I would never stand aside and watch something or somebody suffer how I suffered. I was a fool to think that, there's absolutely nothing I can do about it, not even if I tried a billion times. I am nothing but an extra piece of garbage. I just wish I knew how to make people see that others have emotions too. For I believe that you will have to treat people the way you yourself would obviously want to be treated. Does nobody see that those so called 'trolls' have hearts. It's the inner beauty that matters, respect is reciprocal. I you want to be loved you love, if you want to be hated you hate. Mind you, there's something called karma. And its rule is... What ever goes around... Must surely come around. Be careful of how you treat people. There's good and bad criticism.
Just don't do it too much, know when to stop. Because not everyone has the same personality. Remember... In order to be loved, you MUST love.
