Preston Has a REALLY Corny Time ;)

Preston on the Cob

Preston had finally finished his last year at college and was beginning to enter the world. As Preston was walking through the busy city, he began to hear strange noises coming from a nearby alleyway. As any dumb ass white male in a horror movie would do, he walked straight into the alleyway to begin investigating. As he walked through the alleyway, his hair flopping with each slow, steady step he noticed the noises were coming from behind a large dumpster.

Preston began to slowly walk closer and closer to the dumpster listening as closely as possible , it sounded like a very muffled moan like someone was trapped. Preston began to move the dumpster, but of course it took awhile to move because it was "heavy" (or Preston is just weak) finally, he moved the dumpster out of the way, panting heavily before turning to see what the noise was coming from. What he saw, was a corn on the cob. "What the hell, its just some corn?" He muttered, frustrated. "All that fucking work of some CORN?!?!?!??!?!?" He kicked the dumpster, like a fucking retard, and hurt his foot. Shouting in pain, he gripped his foot tightly, before falling onto his face. Groaning in pain, he slowly got back up, and picked up the corn. "Might as well have dinner." He said, walking out of the alley, corn in hand.

As Preston entered his apartment, he placed the corn on the table, and began to boil some water. As he waited for the water to boil, Preston began to watch anime like the weeaboo he is. "Hey!" Someone yelled from behind Preston, "Over here." Preston quickly turned around, to see the corn standing right before him, but now he was giant, and taller and Preston.... And absolutely stunning. Preston screamed in fear, "WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP?!" He shouted, grabbing a frying pan from the sink to use as protection. "Hey, YOU took ME here?" Taken aback, Preston replied, "YOU'RE the corn I picked up in the alleyway?" The corn smiled "Yes, that would be me."