First Love💔

My First Love

I had just made a Facebook account, than out of no were I was put in some random group chat with females I didn't even know. Some girl said "We need some boys in here" than she added some guy Brandon. Me being noisy, I clicked on his profile and I liked what I seen so I sent him a friend request. After a couple of hours he accepted my request that's when he texted me "Hey, have we met?" I hesitated to reply but I did and said "No it was just a request". He left me on read, but I didn't really care.
A week went by and that morning Brandon had texted me on Facebook saying "Good Morning". I was really excited that he texted me but at the same time I didn't know what to expect so I just went with it and replied "hey". After that day Brandon and I had forever lasting conversations.
A month after talking, I really liked Brandon and I wanted to be with him. Brandon was 17 and I was 14, I didn't really think to much about the age differences. My older cousin always told me "a guy that age only wanted one thing" I didn't believe her but I continued to talk to Brandon. Not only Brandon was 17, he lived in Virginia and I was in Maryland. I didn't care,I really liked Brandon and was praying that he liked me to.
September 10 2014.After school i went home and immediately texted Brandon. Telling Brandon about my day, something told me to ask Brandon the big question. "Do you wanna go out?" I felt kinda weird because its usually the boy who asks the girl that question but I didn't care. After a few minutes of pulling myself together, I asked Brandon "Do you wanna be together?". Brandon said yeah and that was the day my life changed.
Talking for a good month and couple of weeks I told Brandon I loved him. My mother always told me I didn't know what love was but the feelings I had for Brandon were really strong. I honestly did feel that I actually loved Brandon. Brandon told me he loved me to. I had butterflies flying around in my stomach, I never been so happy. I was happy to call Brandon mine.
This one night Brandon and I were just on the phone, everything was silent for like two minutes that's when Brandon said "I'm sorry, I can't do this anymore" Those words coming out of Brandon's mouth really felt like a punch in the chest. Out of the hurt I was feeling I just said "okay", I didn't know what else to say at the moment. That's when Brandon got upset because he was only joking, he wanted to see what my response would be. While I was wiping the years of my face, Brandon was really upset with me. I didn't understand why, I really didn't . I didn't know what I did wrong. After that had happen, our relationship wasn't the same. Brandon and I were always arguing. I didn't know what to do.
A week later, I was so depressed. I didn't know how go fix our relationship. But not only my relationship was turning left, my grades were dropping. I decided to just focus on bettering myself and just work on me for a little. I explained to Brandon what I needed to do and he just left me on read, I was heart broken but I went about my business and did what I had to do. I would text Brandon in the morning, when I would get home, and before I went to sleep just to let him know I still loved him. Brandon never replied. This one night, I was scrolling down my timeline and what I seen broke me. Brandon had got a new girlfriend. Tears immediately fell from my eyes, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I cried myself to sleep that night. I didn't know what I was going to do.
Christmas came and its been two months since I've spoke to Brandon. Brandon got his new girlfriend in November. Thinking about the whole situation made me sick to my stomach. I couldn't even eat and sleep the same, I had Brandon on my mind 24/7 and I didn't know how to get home out my mind. I tried to push the whole situation to the side and just focus on me and what I had to do. I enjoyed my little sisters company, it helped take Brandon off my mind.
January 1 2015. It was 24 more days until my 15 birthday so I was really looking forward to that.That morning when I woke up, something told me to check Facebook. So I grabbed my computer and went online, it said I had a message.. My heart began to race, in the back of my mind I was hoping it was Brandon. And my wish came true, Brandon texted me "Good Morning, and Happy New Years". I didn't know what to do with myself, I was so happy. I replied so fast, that message made me day. That night Brandon and I were talking. I knew I was wrong for jumping back into his arms, I should've acted a certain way towards him. But I couldn't help myself, I misses Brandon a lot and was happy to hear from him. An hour of talking, Brandon asked me for another chance. Me missing him so much, I immediately jumped back into a relationship with him, with no hesitation.
September 9 2015. One day before Brandon and I one year anniversary. Brandon asked for my address, he told me he was coming up to Maryland. I was so happy, but at the same time I didn't believe him. But I still gave him my address, I was so excited for the next day to come. I got in the shower and for some reason something told me to shave so I did. After I ate, took a shower, Brandon and I fell asleep on the phone.
The next morning even though I had school, I put on a dress, I had butterflies in my stomach, I was so excited to finally see the person I've been talking to for the past year. During school I had so many mixed emotions going on. I was happy, nervous, excited. I wasn't even thinking about what my mother was going to say or do. When I got home, I logged on to Facebook and Brandon said "on my way, 5 more mins". I got super nervous because my mother was in her room and I didn't know how I was going to get passed her without her saying anything to me. While I was brushing mg hair and getting myself ready for Brandon, my mother left. I didn't know where she was going but I watched her pull out the drive way. Three minutes later I seen a black Nissan drive through my court and I got a message from Brandon saying "I'm here". I sprayed a quick whiff of my favorite perfume, grabbed my jacket and was out the door. Brandon had went back up the street that's when he made a u turn, as I was walking Brandon thought it was funny to act like he was going to hit me with the car. I laughed and hopped in. The car smelled like straight up weed. I didn't say anything, I was to excited. In the corner of my eye I was looking at Brandon while he was driving. I wasn't nervous or anything, I felt really comfortable.
Brandon and I went to the mall. Holding my baby's hand while walking in the mall felt so amazing. He took me into Bath & Body Works. I picked out like 6 bottles of perfume, and Brandon paid for it. I didn't know how to thank him. That's when we went to the food court, and stood in Popeye's line. Brandon pulled me closer to him, when I looked at him, we kissed. My legs weakened, his lips were so soft and they tasted like smoke. We took pictures while waited for our food. After we sat down and ate, we left than went to the movies. The movie we wanted to see didn't play until five hours later, so we just sat in the car.
Sitting in back seat of the car, we was talking and just having a good time together. That's when Brandon pulled me closer and we started kissing. It felt like I was in a dream, I couldn't believe I was sitting here kissing Brandon. After kissing, I laid down and Brandon got on type of me than started kissing/sucking my neck.. That's when I was no longer a virgin.
After we finished, I realized down there something wasn't right. So I touch to try and make sure everything was okay but Brandon didn't wear a condom and he, yeah. I was so afraid, I was even on birth control or anything. I was so pissed,but at the same time I couldn't help but be happy.
A few minutes later, Brandon got a call from his brother and he told me that the cops were looking for me. So Brandon took me back home, before I got out the car I gave him a hug and kiss, grabbed my stuff and told him "I love you and I'll talk go you later". Brandon said the same thing than took off, seeing Brandon going home really made me so sad. But I was glad that I got the chance to spend time with my baby.
When I walked through the front door, my little sister yells "MOMMY, SHES HERE". My good mood just immediately drops. When I walked to my mom, she was crying. I honestly didn't care. My mom didn't like Brandon because of his age. My mother said "the officer will be here soon", I was so pissed off I really wanted to smack the shit out of her but I didn't. Thats when I remembered I have to go to the bathroom so I can clean myself up. Once I gold my mom I needed to use the bathroom, she wanted to watch me, I got really nervous. I didn't know if she could tell if I had sex earlier or not, so I just hurried up and peed thats when I wiped really fast. When the office came into the house, I just broke down. I was mad, sad and just so hurt. All I could think about was Brandon, I needed to make sure he was okay. But I couldn't at the time so that really ate me up in the inside. The office asked a whole bunch of questions like "what did you guys do?" ,"Where did y'all go?", "Did you have sex?" , etc. I told the officer "yeah we did have sex", that's when my mother just broke down crying. I didn't know why she was crying. I felt like everyone lost their virginity at on point of their life so I didn't really care my mother took me to the hospital, and was trying to have the nurses clean my, yeah bug I wouldn't allow it. So we left and a week later my mother put me on birth control. After I got it, I got some much tired and I gained a lot of weight. My mother broke my phone so I couldn't talk to Brandon while I was home. I used the school computer to stay in contact with Brandon. On the weekends I would bring a friend over and use their phones.
At school this girl gave me her old tablet. I was so happy to hear Brandon's voice on messenger. But Brandon didn't sound to happy when we were talking. I asked him what was wrong that's when he told me he had sex with another girl. I cried and cried and cried but I didn't wanna leave him so I stayed. Brandon and I got a hotel room for a couple of days and had a lot of fun together. We had a lot of sex, that's all we did in the room. Ordered food and just had an amazing time with each other. When it was time for the both of us to go home, he dropped me off at my moms. But she told me to pack all my stuff and go back out with Brandon. So I did, I packed everything up and Brandon and I went to the grocery store parking lot. Brandon called his family to tell them he were on the wah and I was with him. When we got to Virginia, it was like 2 in the morning and we went to his sisters apartment. I really appreciated the way she let me stay there. Brandon had school the next morning, so he left me in the apartment with his sister. After a couple hours later Brandon came back and I was so relieved. I was with Brandon down Virginia for a week, but Brandons mom made me go back up Maryland because she didn't want my mom doing anything crazy that'll try and get Brandon in trouble.
When I got to my moms, she put me out again, than I went to my grandparents. I was in contact with Brandon, that was all that mattered to me. I used my grandmother's phone when she was asleep to call and text Brandon.
September 10 2016. Brandon and I second year anniversary. I was super happy. After being through so much I was really happy that we lasted for so long. I had a plan for us to see each other. My dads side of the family were having their family get together so I figured that would be the perfect time go sneak Brandon up to Maryland without my mother knowing. I gave Brandon the address to my Grandmas house and my grandma called mg mother when Brandon got there. I thought we were done, but my grandmother convinced my mom to let Brandon stay for the day. I was SL happy to see my baby for the first time in months.
After our anniversary, Brandon was having his graduation. I wasn't able to go, I felt really bad. Brandon got a new girlfriend. Felt a punch in the stomach, couldn't believe it. I was so fed up with Brandons bullshit, so I didn't even pay him no mind after that. But Brandon was still texting and calling me talking about how much he wanted me back. I didn't take him back because I was tired of the bullshit. I wasn't going to have Brandon think it was okay for him to just go out, screw, and think he can come back when he felt like it.
Now a year went by without us being together. Brandon still text and calls my phone. I still talk to Brandon but until he get his priorities straight and he figures out what he wants, I don't want nothing to do with him. I still love Brandon and I will always have love for Brandon but its just time for me to move on until he gets himself together..