Shades of Grey

Chapter Two

Christian's POV

"No. No!", I say in my sleep as another damned nightmare is coming back to haunt me.

The scary man is here. Or is he there? I hear voices from everywhere. I hear Mommy scream and ask him to stop. What's he doing? I have to stay put.

I put my hands on my eyes and try to hide from the shouting. I heard a thud and Mommy stops crying.

I hear big, heavy, scary footsteps nearby and I try my best to stay quiet. I have to stay quiet. He can't hear me at all.

Suddenly I see the big, scary man come into my room and I try not to move so that he won't see me. Mommy always said to stay still and pretend I was invisible. The man can't see me. He can't see me at all.

I hear a thumping inside and wonder if that's my heart. Why is it beating so quickly? Where's my mommy? Where's my mommy? Then, I see him, the big, scary man found me.

I wake with a start. My chest is heaving, and my body is covered in sweat. These damn nightmares are getting more vivid than usual. I can't take it anymore.

My breathing is desperately trying to slow itself down, and I'm trying to follow its example. I rest my head in my hands as I start to slow down. Maybe I should find a therapist. Grace might appreciate that, I think to myself. She always expects me to be a perfect son and quite frankly, I don't think that I'll ever be. It's hard to be a perfect son in a perfect family.

I look at my clock and it says 5:45. Will I ever get some damn sleep? I doubt it at this point. I decide that I need some time to myself and leave my unwelcoming bedroom behind.

I stand in the great room of my apartment, still wearing nothing more than a pair of pajama pants, and reluctantly decide on a glass of water to calm my nerves. I take a glass from the cabinet-thank you Mrs. Jones-and turn on the faucet until the glass is almost full. I take the welcomed liquid into my throat and finish the glass in one taking. I set it down and leave it there, just in case.

I pace back and forth in my living room, wondering what I should be doing now. There's no woman to be spending some time with, so I'm on my own here while my staff are fast asleep. That damn nightmare still isn't leaving.

It was her fault, the bitch. She got what she deserved, I think to myself. I know I was too young to understand but looking back on it, I'm glad that I was finally able to get away from her. If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have any permanent marks from her so-called "lover", as if he actually meant something to her.

I look down at my chest and sigh to control my temper. Grace said they might go away in time, but I doubt she completely knows what she's talking about. I've had them since I was four Grace. They would be gone by now, I think angrily to myself.

Calm down, Grey.

Shut up.

Frustrated, I slowly walk upstairs and make my way towards my favorite room; the Play Room. It's been almost a year since a woman was punished in here, and I'm honestly beginning to loathe being so alone right now. After the media outrage when my company was expanding, I had no interest of even thinking about another Submissive, even when in the back of my mind I wanted one more than anything. Elena would understand that. Linc never gave her anything at all. Either way, I like my privacy.

I pull out my key from my pants' pocket, insert, and turn before entering. I enter a code--1989--into a little box on the side, and the lights start to switch on. A small smile evaporates on my mouth as I stare at the glorious view: the room is full of red linen is every direction you turn; the bed neatly folded in red leather; belts, canes, floggers, everything I need for the utmost control in my life. Fuck; this room says it all. It's the only place in my life that I feel so in control of everything I possess, and it's the only place where I can truly be me without anyone getting up in my damn face. This is what I need, and I don't plan on leaving it behind.