The tale of Pepe and Ryan Ross's love child

The Plan

'PEPE DOESN'T DESERVE RYAN' I thought to myself. 'WHY WOULD RYAN WANT TO DATE A MEME AND NOT ME' I continued to think like this through the day, then I spotted them walking hand in hand at the mall. People were looking at them funny and Pepe looked sad and I silently did a little victory dance in the corner. I walked into a nearby shop and Pepe and Ryan walked in. I start to panic! And hid behind a shelf. Ryan had put me on a harassment order on me which meant I was not allowed within 500 metres of him. As I hid behind the shelf I noticed that Pepe's stomach looked larger then it hit me, Pepe is pregnant. I wanted to scream beacsued Ryan was supposed to make me pregnant not Pepe. I devised a plan to kidnap Pepe. As soon as they walked out of the store I went up behind them and knocked Ryan out. I grabbed Pepe and ran. I was going to cut the baby out and have it for myself. I took Pepe back to my place after knocking him out with chloroform and put him on my table ready to be sliced open. I strapped him down and began with the procedure.