Broken Glass

Somedays it just felt like picking up pieces of broken glass. Not even the interesting kind you find when you stumble along someone's abandoned homestead walking through the prarie. It was like waking up to find the plate you shattered last week strewn about your kitchen floor all over again! And so, every morning, you get down on your knees, pick up the pieces, and throw the unsalvagable treasure away.
It had been over a month since Annalise's best friend broke her heart over cruel words. When Miranda, the best friend, had come around to say "I didn't really mean it." Annalise had flamed. Oddly, it was a comfort to Annalise that the folley and the blame could be placed on both parties! Ending the friendship had been a mutual decision made by two angry young women.
It had started with a loving yet critical comment about how much weed Miranda smoked, then it snowballed into an intervention. With good reason, Annalise was concerned for her friend's well being as she had no job, was living in her boyfriend's couch, and was constantly posting about her love of pot on social media.
It had started as a slow burn. Miranda started smoking in high school after a sports injury left her in pain and crestfallen. It did help her depression as well as the pain. At the time Annalise was happy her friend had found something that worked even though she had no interest in joining her and it was illegal.
Four years after graduating high school, there they were. Annalise was an intern for a local radio station and Miranda had pot and her boyfriend's couch. If her friend hadn't hit rock bottom she would be there soon.
"You should apply for McDonalds." Annalise had suggested. "I'm fairly certian they don't drug test you there." There was one up the street the three of them frequently haunted when Derek, the boyfriend, wasn't working his shift on the oil rig.
"Eh..."
It was then Annalise lost her patience and began a long, emotional, outburst, of loving rebuke. Key notes included "You can't just live off of Derek's dime! What happens when the oil boom slows?!", "You're better than this.", "I want to see you do something with you life!", "What happened to your dreams?"
Miranda snapped back "Don't preach at me!" And let loose an endless stream of cutting retaliation in anger. "You're a sell out! You used to want to be a real DJ! Now you're just an intern working for some radio station in a back water town!", "You think you're better than me with that fancy degree in nothing!", "At least I can get a man!", and even delved into sins Annalise had committed against her best friend six years ago. It was terrible and accurate. Miranda had catologed each and everyone of Annalise's insecurities, ran down the list, and threw them back in her face. By the time Miranda had finished Annalise was trembling and red. She did not cry. She did not say a word. She just stood and walked out leaving her sister-friend in the putrid apartment.
It was a month later she got the "apology" text. Most of it was just Miranda telling her to never rebuke her again. Five paragraphs and only one was actually "Sorry."
Annalise wished it were physical so she could physically throw it in the garbage. So she decided to sit down and write a physical letter in response. Annalise hadn't had the self confidence she once had after her best friend threw her worst fears back at her. And she told her so. She closed her letter with "Take care of yourself, Miranda." And sent it off.
As way of response a week later she recieved the half of a heart necklace they had kept but not worn since they were 15 in the mail. Annalise was completely shattered.
As life tends to, her personal life bled into her professional life. Thankfully, her understanding coworkers and classmates knew what it was like to loose a friend this way and allowed Annalise to grieve as if Miranda died.
Still, a month later, Annalise was trying to pick the pieces of her broken heart off the kitchen floor and carry on. She'd never be the same but that's not always a bad thing.