January 4th, 2018
It's the little things that matter to me. The opening a door for me, offering me food or drinks, offering for a ride, the little things. I don't want to be a rebound, I want to stay friends because I don't see a future with you and that's okay. I see us prospering into fine people but separated in time. You deserve somebody who will understand you, who will love you and cherish you more than anyone has. I deserve more than what offer me, so much more. I'm such an incredible person. I give great advice, I love, I care, I cherish and I'm taken advantage of.. I truly hope this friendship lasts longer than I expect it to because I truly do love you and cherish you so much. Having that said, you need to stop being afraid of being alone. You will love again, you will see the true meaning of love again, you will care again, you will devote your life to someone else again.
I'm so confortable around you, I can be myself but I sometimes feel like I'm taken advantage of and I hate it. We both suffer from mental illnesses that fuck us up big time. You tried bringing in a subject that is forbidden for us to converse about. I told you, I'm done with your little games, I'm done feeling hopeless, I'm done feeling not loved enough, I'm done being the second option, I'm just done.
This year will be different because I will be different. I will put myself before others, I will be selfish but kind, I will love but not trust easily, I will say no, I will be confident, I will love myself, I will be a women who is not dependent of others, I will be strong, I will be proud but humble, I will be a better me. I will love me.
