Goodbye Summer

Afraid Of Love

Suzy POV

It has been more than 6 months now since Amber started courting me. I never in a million year thought that a simple show could bring me the person that would cause me sure happiness.

My time in IY2 was amazing and unforgettable thanks to Amber. It brought us close together. There were times that l thought of Amber as my lover because of the activities that we had to done as pair like preparing dishes, visiting neighbours. I also didn´t know how to swim and it was Amber who gave me swimming lessons, and thanks to her great teaching skills, l can now swim.

I was actually scared at first when the show was about to end because l thought it would also the end of my time with Amber. That after filming we would return to being strangers. I really liked being with her, talking with her and l was hoping it would last longer.

On the last day of filming, l was so sad but l still kept smiling in front of the cameras. My heart was filled with grief as l imagined my farewell to Amber drawing nearer every minute pass by.

I never really knew what Amber thought of me or if she was feeling the same that l was. When l was about to leave the set, Amber approached me. She asked for me to go with her for a while, and that she will be the one to bring me back to our dorms. I wasn´t so sure what to reply but l was glad that she wanted to spend more them with me so l agreed to accompany her.

She didn´t tell me where exactly we were heading to, just that it was a surprise. The drive was not so long since we were talking and whenever l was with her, time just felts to pass by fast but naturally. It is like we are in our own world and nothing seems to matter as long as we were together. It was how comfortable being with her felt like.

Then she suddenly stopped the car in front of a salon. I was shocked as to why to stop there but she just smiled at me and reminded me that it was part of the surprise. She then quickly got out of the car and opened the door for me. I had butterflies in my stomach because of her actions. She ushered me inside the salon and l was taken aback with all the things she had prepared.

Despite being in the IY2 set, she managed to have a reservation for us there, as well as outfits that were gorgeously prepared and waiting for us to be worn. When l asked her, how she knew of my size and when she prepared everything, she just told me that she had connections and that she make the calls and preparation during the filming breaks. I really liked that fact that even though she was the one who choose what l was wearing, she made sure that it was revealing. By the time we were done, l was already wearing a modest pretty white dress and my date looked really manly in her suit.

Next stop of the surprise was at a fine dining restaurant, which made the change of outfit more rational. I was at awe when l saw the spot she had reserved for us. We were at the top floor, our table was by the window and we had a breath taking view.

We then enjoyed our delicious meals and great music. She then told me how grateful she was that l was her partner for the show and that she had fun thanks to me though l was the one who was lucky to have her as my partner.

“You could have just said thank you. You didn´t have to do all of this you know?”, l said with a shy smile, as my heart kept pounding against my chest.

“I know, but l wanted to. There is also something that l wanted to tell you”, she answered with her soft angelic voice.

“Thank you anyways, l really appreciate the surprise. And is it you want to tell me?”, l asked nervously,

“Well, you see l like you Suzy. But not just as a friend. I have not met anyone like you and to be honest, you are the only one that l can imagine myself courting.”

 l was so shocked and happy at the same time as l heard her say those words. Words didn´t come out of my mouth and l was utterly speechless.

“I cannot explain why, but all l know is that l like seeing you smile and l to be the one to protect you from anyone who tries to take it away from you. Being with you fills my heart with happiness and l want to make you feel special and loved every day, because you desire it.

All l am asking is a chance. A chance for me to know you more. And for you to know me as well. You don´t have to reciprocate my feelings. Just allow me to show and express it to you. And if you don’t feel comfortable with it, if you want me stop, I will.”

As l was looking deep into her eyes, all l could see was sincerity, compassion and love. So who am l to reject? I admit, l am afraid to love, because frankly who wouldn´t. To love means to invest ones time and emotions. Yes, there is a possibility to be hurt, but l have never met someone as honest and sincere as Amber. For her to do this event for me and to risk the chances of being rejected by me, l am really lucky. Lucky to have found someone brave enough to commit herself in winning my heart. And if giving her a chance is a risk of giving hurt, l would still take it. I would put my faith in her.

“Amber…Thank you…I don´t think l deserve you, but yes, I´ll give you a chance”, l finally said to her while looking down hoping she couldn’t see me blush "And ....... please be patient with me".

I suddenly felt her hand caress my cheeks tenderly. She stared at my eyes as if she was looking straight to my soul with an angelic smile plastered in her face. Her other hand held my hand and she kissed if softly which only sent me to the clouds.

“I won´t make you regret it”, she concluded.

And she was right, because until now, after 6 months of courting, she was not yet given up. She is still giving me time to answer, never failing to give me her time and shower me with affection.

I was so lost in my trace about Amber when l felt my member Min poking cheek.

“Stop, what is it?”, l asked her still not fully focused.

“Amber wanted me to give this to you”, she said as she handed me a small green box with a note card attached in it. ”Never knew she was the romantic type you know”

“Well she is. To the point you would never imagine”, l answered while giggling because l remember how sweet Amber is to me.

“To be expected. She doesn´t treat us like that you know. She is only like that to you, not everyone.”, she then looks at me seriously. “When are you giving her your answer?  You have made her wait for a long time now. Look l don’t want to pressure you because it is Amber´s decision to wait for you, but she is also my close friend and l don’t want her to get hurt. Just please be honest to her, and don’t lead her on if she is waiting for nothing. ”

“Min, l understand you. But l could never hurt Ambers feelings and l never will. She has showed me love that l have never known before and l want to return it, just as much as she gave me. So don´t worry. When l answer her, l want it to be special. Will you help me?, l explained clearly.

“Of course l will. So it is soon l guess”, she exclaimed excitedly.

“Yes”, then l opened the gift Amber gave me. Inside was a necklace with a key pendant.

I couldn’t help but smile. Then l read the note. And my face involuntary flushed due to her words.

To my Angel

     How is my beautiful angel doing today? I am sorry l couldn´t come visit you on your show today, but let me make it up to you. You see the key pendant, it is the only key to open a very important thing. If you wish to know what it is, meet me tomorrow at our secret place. I will be waiting for you :)

PS: Miss you already and can´t wait to see your smile again <3

-your Amber