Wounded : Paralysed But Alive

Paralysed But Alive

Have you ever felt like your whole life depends on only one decision? Me, yes.  I knew that I should have taken the right decision as soon as possible, I knew every consequences of the bad decision but still I wanted to make the bad decision. But everytime I try to do so, God always find a way to bring me back to the right decision. 

I am Hanna Atchia and this is my story. I never wanted to make my life such a disaster but I did not wrote my own destiny. Maybe I had the choice in my hand but I could not made any. 

And today I feel so helpless. I don't know from where I should start and where I should end. But all I want is to make the right choice for once because my whole life depends on  it. 

I opened my eyes and I was lying on the hospital bed. I could not understand anything cause I was barely in my right state of mind. Everything was blurry but my feelings were not. All I could hear was "we fear she might not make it out alive".

After that I felt a slight prick on my hand and this was when I went back to reminisce the most beautiful moment of my life. A time of my life where I was not just breathing I was surviving. I was alive.

I tried to move but felt paralysed but deep down I was alive.

It's been said that the most difficult time of ones life is the teenage days.  But It's also the most pure and innocent time where one discovers their own reality.

It all started 5 years ago, when my aunt was going to get married for the second time. Since my mom is the elder sister she had to meet the chosen partner of her sister Veronica. 

Aunt Veronica is a makeup artist and on that particular day, I accompanied her to a wedding so as to help her. Then after that we were supposed to go and gave dinner with her future husband and my parents.  But little did I know that a new character would walk into my ' oh so perfect life'.

I was going through her phone gallery when I found picture of a boy I've seen before. Flashbacks got the best of me and I recognised that I once added him on friendbook, he was in my suggestions.  Automatically a smile grew on my face and I did not even know why.

I was so overwhelm by this feeling that nothing in that moment mattered. All I wanted was that to feel like this forever.

While Aunt Veronica was working, I was sitting and watching her.  Her phone beeped. The  lockscreen showed 'Jake'. 

" Ahem... somebody is missing you to death eun". I said playfully.

She gave me a shy smile and asked me to open the message and read it for her.

" Hey honey, I'm on my way. Just letting you know that my nephew is with me and he's feeling shy because Hanna is going to be there too". I read.

I could not believe my eyes. Did he just said 'nephew'. As in the nephew I found cute and added him on friendbook without having the slightest hint that we would end up being relatives one day. And wait "WHAT?" He's feeling shy because of a sweet and innocent angel like me. 

Clearly God was playing that night. 

My aunt asked him to reply to him by saying " come on handsome hunk, why shy ?".

After sometime,

My Aunt hurriedly called him and It as his nephew that picked up the phone, which clearly means that while Jake was driving he asked his nephew to type the message for him.

And here I was the one typing the message too for my aunt.

It was like we were texting each other without even talking to each other. OMG ! does that even make sense?

That night I was feeling a strange kind of happiness inside of me. A kind of happiness that without wanting to smile made me smile and I just could not hide that glow on my face. And somewhere deep inside I knew it was because the new stranger I'd be meeting in some times.

Despite not knowing why I felt like that, I was reminded of a line my father always says to me

" The day you will find the one , The feeling will be different, the atmosphere will be different. And after that there will be no turning back."