Silence Is Bliss

You...

What did you think,
The first time we spoke.
Was I not what you expected,
Did you think I was a joke.

Why would you play me,
And lead me to dismay,
Was that the intention.
Did you not want me to stay.

I did try my hardest,
But I don't want to play.
Your words covered in scarlet,
You knew what to say.

You played me like a fiddle,
Your bow on my strings.
But I let you play me.
Because the tune helped me sing.

Your complements,
My innocence,
I believed every word.

And you dragged me along,
Because I got tangled up.
In the words of that chilling song.

It was hard to keep you happy,
But you said that I helped.
I spent far too much time.
That I forgot about myself.

I was too naïve,
I trusted you to stay.
But when I asked for your help.
You walked away.

I don't know why I did it,
And its so hard to admit.
But I trusted your words,
Like the songs of little birds.

But now that I'm thinking,
Was anything you said true.
Are you actually hurting,
Or was that a lie too.

Did I actually save you,
Or were they just words.
Did you make that up,
Because nothing you say ever adds up.

I really want to end it,
I want to just choke.
But I don't want to give you satisfaction.
Of letting you hold the rope.

Why did I believe you.
Why did I stay.
Why do I wish that,
I'd never messaged you that day.

But I can't say it's your fault.
You didn't force me to stay.
I felt so sorry for you,
And that's just my way.

I should have thought it through,
And I meant every word I told you.
Once I did love you, but your words have now cut though.

You broke down my walls.
And now they remain still.
They're crumbled and broken,
But, I still forgive you.

// Sorry to disappoint but this is not really dedicated to anyone as of now. It did once but not anymore.
Please let me know what you think. It's one of my longest poems atm.