All I could feel was silence. Well- not like I can really FEEL silence, but it was so chill and quiet to where silence was nearly an emotion. In case you didn't know, my name is Saihara Shuuichi and I am the Ultimate Detective. While my title is so high and fairly respected by other people, I don't think I deserve that title all too much- it isn't as if I solved a million cases without breaking down or having an issue.
While I force myself to wake up completely, the silence fades away to the back of my mind, where the rest of my dreams would reside and eventually cease to exist unless or until they reoccurred the same way. Dreams are weird you know- that's exactly why I can't force myself to think of them so much. They're hallucinations that you forget almost instantly. I think I've forgotten every dream I've ever had except for one.
We all remember at least one dream we've had, right? And when we remember it, it's a sign it was worth remembering. That's really just what I think of it anyway. The dream I can't seem to forget is also a dream that keeps happening. For whatever reason, one of the most creepy students in my class keep appearing in it- Well.. uhm.. I suppose I shouldn't say someone's creepy.. even if it is in my own head.
That man's name is Korekiyo Shinguuji. We talk frequently, but not very easily due to his intelligent and intimidating aura. Nobody ever says much about him and when they do, it's never anything positive. He isn't a delinquent, but he has some odd behavior- always touching his face, studying the girls, hiding his lower face with a mask. It's really a wonder that he hasn't been dress coded.
My dream. I'll be completely honest when I say I can still feel everything about it. People don't like to admit they enjoy certain things and sometimes when their mind creates certain things when they're asleep, they simply cannot not think of it again. The second it slips back into your mind is also the second you're trapped and you know you're into it.
I almost didn't want to believe it too much either, but the dream kept coming back and every single time, I remembered every detail and felt amazing. I can nearly still feel his pale, slender fingers grasp onto my hips. I truly never considered myself a perverted person. Though it's slightly difficult to think myself to be pure when I always catch myself staring at the masked man recently.
Every second I see Korekiyo, I can't help but have those hallucinatory passionate moments glue to my mind and make me blush. Seeing as he is generally very observant and intelligent, I'm entirely sure he can tell what I'm thinking when I stare at him or look at him the way that I do. What am I supposed to do in a situation like this? Do I just suck it up and go back to normal so I can see my friend as my friend?
Ah.. actually, I'm not entirely sure that's possible. I try to help myself, but I'm just going back and forth. The only reason I was brought to think I should change is coming from the dream. So I'm basically talking about the dream, saying I should forget it, as I'm remembering it and talking about how amazing it was.
I'd hate to be a hypocrite, but if my feelings are inevitable, I won't ignore them. That feeling when I'm around that boy is unexplainable and I can't help but know that he feels similarly on some level.
Slowly sitting up from my bed, I notice a slight bump in my sheets. While I do sigh, I force myself to get up and walk to the bathroom. If my mind can build me up and make me think this way, there's nothing that I could do to hurt it by contributing to it.
*yeah ofc there will be another chapter*
