You.

I. The Past

This book is partially based off a true story.

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Being a person of so many flaws meant having to go through numerous days of name calling, depression and anxiety.

Middle school was filled with drama, always being pulled into it not being able to stay neutral..
My insecurities and anxiety built up from everything. Now i'm just a girl who can't get out of her shell because she's too afraid to be hurt.

But then there was a boy, lets call him Mark. He saw through my flaws when nobody else could, he would be by my side always telling me he loved me and cared for me. I felt safe with him. He was like my diary, my best friend. I felt that he was the one that I was meant to be with. He always told me things that made me feel like everyone else was wrong about him, that he will grow and become a better person than he is now. I believed in him. Sure we'd go on and off in our relationship but everything always led back to him. Always him. We always came back to each other no matter how bad of a fight we might've had or the mistakes he has made. His apologies always put a spell on my heart that told me to give him another chance.. He told me he was different now and that he loves me and can never stop thinking about me or looking at me whenever we crossed paths.

Stupid to think I believed his lies. Love makes you blind, and you'd do anything because you love them. But that's middle school right? It's all about learning life lessons, teaching you how to grow up so you don't have to make those mistakes later on in life.

After I was finally a freshman, things began to change. Change for the better. The school I got accepted into was a small medical high school. Only few were accepted but it was a school only if they were able to take on college leveled work and numerous days of little to no sleep.
Everyone at that school were social butterflies. Friendly, talkative, social.
My shy personality didn't fit in with everyone, I spent my days sitting alone spending time with the little friends at had. But there was one girl who kept me company. Her name was Mackenzie. We snuck into an area where nobody is allowed, always talked about how much we hated the school and we both promised to drop out once the school year ended. She was the reason I survived my freshman year.

Fast forwarding to sophomore year:
The first day after transferring felt absolutely terrible. I hated it even more and it was causing me to just hate my life more than I already did. Sure i had more friends here at this bigger school, but I was separated from them all. I was stuck in classrooms of loud immature kids, joking around and talking about inappropriate subjects.
I soon began to fit in through the school year and realized this was where i belonged. Nothing seemed off anymore, I felt happy. Even found another guy to crush on, but of course that didn't work out for me.

Junior Year.

I've been in an orchestra ever since elementary, working my way up to becoming a section leader. I absolutely love being in orchestra and just being a musician in general. The only class that feels like a second family, other than my friends of course. There was a boy, asian, cute, quiet. A cellist named John. I was a violist. And no, not a violinist, but a viola player. He was a nice guy, and I crushed hard for him. I tried anything just to be friends with him but i was always too shy to approach him or look him in the eyes. He was absolute perfection.

And this is where I start my story.