"It's easy to fake a smile when you've been doing it for a while."

Chapter 1

Levi's POV]

"YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT! Can't you do one fucking thing right!" Kenny yelled as he was holding a knife against my throat. I screamed when he pressed the knife in my skin. "P-please I-'m begging y-ou do-" I was interrupt when the doorbell rang. Kenny mubled something along the lines of we'll finish this later and then throws me on the floor.

Let's start from the beginning shall we? My name is Levi Rivaille Ackerman I'm 16 years old. I go to school at Wall Maria Highschool, wtf is that for name in the first place? Anyways. I'm one of those kids you call 'nerds', I'm that kid that always get picked on, I'm
the he kid that always get bullied and the kid that gets the 'daily beatings' at school.
Oh,
that's not even the worst part of it. Not to mention that my parents are very abusive, my 'father' Kenny always get drunk and beats me up every fucking day. My 'mother' is the same but less aggressive. Kenny is some sort of drugs dealer and Kuchel (A/N: That's his mother) is a prostitute. I'm very depressed and I cut. Oww how could I forgot. I have a crush on a certain brunette.
Named
Eren
fucking
Yeager.
One of the schools hottest and most popular boy. Pretty much a fuck boy.

Here I am sitting in the back of the classroom reading a book. It is the first period; biology. As usual our teacher Mr Pixis aka Pixie is late.
"-yeah, did you see how much fondation he's wearing? It's so ugly. I bet that I would throw up if I saw what's under there." Petra said or how I call her 'Ms tree hugger' "Oooh hahaha that would be sooo funny, he probably looks like a troll! Hitch laughed. "Hey girls watcha talking about?" Eren said in low, seductive voice. They both giggled. Then Hitch said "We're talking about how ugly Levi looks." "Ha yeah he's already so ugly with a ton of make up on his face, wonder how he looks like without ma- Wait I don't even wanna know."
Fuck that hurts that hurt so fucking hearing those words comming from the only person you ever loved in your life. I feld tears pricking in the corners of my eyes. Then Hitch said something I didn't hear all to well, and suddenly everyone started laughing. I know all to well that they're laughing about something Hitch said about me probably something about my make up. I tried to ignore this but honestly i felt like crying. At that moment Mr Pixie came in. As fast as I could i grabbed my bag and asked him if I could go to the toilet. I quickly got to the boys toilet and check to see if I'm alone. Then I felt many tears rolling down my cheeks. I grabbed my bag and pulled a razor out. I rolled my sleeves up and slide the blade along my skin and cut in big letters 'WORTHLESS' on my left arm. When I was done I cleaned my cuts and went back to hell.

*TIMESKIP*__________________________

When the last period was finished I hurried so I wouldn't be late at work. Yeah I had a job because I had to pay for all my own things such as clothes, notebooks,... even food. Wich was almost impossible, cause my parents toke 1/6 of that money. My boss Mr Kirstein was a strict but nice boss, but the problen was that his son was Jean. Jean Kirstein. One of Eren's friends; a very popular guy. The thing is Jean always sabotage me. Like when I work in the kitchen he 'accidentally' add sugar instead of salt or when I work as waiter he 'accidentally' tackles me. But it was always my fault. I can't believe that Mr Kirstein thinks that his son is an angel. But I can't blame him Jean is good at lying and act- fuck the boss is comming to me. What did I do this time? Then i saw Jean trailing behind him with a smirk on his face. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Ok levi just calm down. Calm. Down. Just act normal. "Y-yes Mr Kirstein." I stuttered. Then he said three words that made my heart stop beating. "You. Are. Fired." Wait what, no no no. I can't be fired. No this can't be i must have misunderstood. "I'm s-orry sir,

could you repeat that p-lease." "I said, You. Are. Fired. Are you deaf or something?" "B-but, why?" "Why? Why! You damn know why! Jean told me everything!" Of course that horceface. "Now get out!" No-o I can't lose this job how can I afford everyting. "OUT! NOW!"

*TIMESKIP*__________________________

How. How do I tell my parents about this. They would flip. Kenny would beat me maybe even kill me. That were my thoughts the whole way home. Now I stood before the front door of my house trembling and thinking how I would tell them. I opened the door and hoped Kenny wasn't home. "What do you think you're doing, you peasant." "D-dad you're h-ome." "Of course I am you fucking idiot." My hands were sweating and I was shaking, I took a deep breath and said "I'm f-fired." "You, what!" "I-Im fir-" "I HEARD YOU, YOU FUCKING DUMBASS!", he yelled. Then he goes to the kitchen and grabbed something, a second later he comes back with a knife in his hands. "YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT! Can't you do one fucking thing right!" Kenny yelled as he was holding a knife against my throat. I screamed when he pressed the knife in my skin. "P-please I-'m begging y-ou do-" I was interrupt when the doorbell rang. Kenny mumbled something along the lines of we'll finish this later and then throws me on the floor.

When Kenny opened the door I saw his' friends' in the door opening. He glanced at me and then glared "WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE GET OUT OF HERE!" I quickly got up and grabbed my bag and an oversized hoodie.

It's not the first time that this happend. Sometimes I had to sleep for 3 days on the street. But this time it was different then others; I couldn't come back there till I found a job. Which is difficult when you look like shit and are homeless . When I entered the park I found a place surrounded by many trees so I decided I could sleep there. I sat down and leaned against a tree and started crying. What should I do? I'm homeless, I don't have a job, the only money I got with me was maximum 5$. Then a voice in my head said, 'Why would you care? You have nobody that cares about you, everyone hates you. Why haven't you killed yourself yet? Why not cut a little deeper? It'll feel great.' That's when I realized that it was truth. Everyone hates me, I hate myself why would I torture myself by staying alive, when I can simply make all the pain disappear? I looked to see if I was the only person in the parc. I was. Then I grabbed my bag and opened it and pulled out my razors. I slice it across my arm. 'Didn't I tell you to cut deaper! Can't you at least do one thing good!? Everyone would be happy if you did. Eren would be happy.' So I did. I cut deaper and deaper. 'Good boy~ see that wasn't so difficult, he? Now slide your throat would you?' Whit shaking hands I brought the razor near my throat. So this is the end he? Well I don't really have anything to say except.

"I hate you so much Eren, but yet I love you."
Then everything went black.

(A/N: This is not the end of the story.)